No Contest
by Slayer2003
Summary: Working title. Jack, Kate, and Sawyer have been captured by the mysterious Others. But these extraordinary circumstances are no reason for Jack and Sawyer to abandon their rivalry for Kate's affections...
1. I

No Contest

Summary: Jack, Kate, and Sawyer have been captured by the mysterious Others. But these extraordinary circumstances are no reason for Jack and Sawyer to abandon their rivalry for Kate's affections...

Yeah, this sort of picks up where the end of season two left off... Jack, Kate and Sawyer stuck in a room together, fighting to stay sane. You know, usual Lost craziness. This is going to be either Jate or Skate, and I have one of the two in mind, but we'll have to see how it goes...

Rated T, but it's a pretty hard T for general torture situations and a few F-bombs. Might become M later... we'll see how it goes

**Disclaimer: All of Lost and it's brilliance belongs to JJ and all the honchos at ABC**. **In short, I don't own. I don't claim to, and I'm not making money off this. Just having some fun.**

---------------

Sawyer awoke very slowly. He had to blink a few times to clear the thin mist that floated across his vision. It was very dark; the only source of light was a dim orange bulb hanging from the ceiling. He didn't register much else at first- whatever drug that was in his system hadn't fully worn off yet and he was still drifting in and out of consciousness. He was aware that he was sitting on a dirt floor, and that he was leaned against a concrete wall. His hands were unbound but his gag was still in place. Two other dark shapes were slumped against the wall opposite to him. Jack was propped up in the corner, head lolling at his chest and Kate was sprawled on the floor next to him.

He tried to lift his hands to untie his gag, but his arms felt like they had twenty pound weights attached to them. Sawyer sighed and blinked hard a few times, willing the drowsiness to leave him. It took him another ten minutes before he summoned up the will to move. He started slowly, wiggling his toes and fingers and then his feet and hands until his entire body co-operated a little better. He untied his gag and spat to get rid of the leftover fibres and the bad taste in his dry mouth.

"Jack?" he called, voice raspy. "Kate?" The circumstances seemed to call for him to use their real names. When nobody answered back, he pushed himself off the wall and crawled over to them, shaking Kate gently and murmuring "Freckles?" into her ear. She didn't respond- she was still out cold but breathing slowly and steadily. He moved over and shook Jack by the shoulders with a little more vigor. Almost immediately Jack gave a low groan and rolled his head slowly up around to rest on the wall.

He tried to say something, but nothing comprehensible came out through the gag. He tried to lift his hands as Sawyer had, but failed and let them flop uselessly back to the ground.

Sawyer took pity on him and gave his gag a good tug and threw it away carelessly and slumped tiredly into the wall adjacent.

Jack said something that sounded vaguely like a thank you and blinked hard a few times. It was a good few minutes before he mustered the energy to say anything else. "Is Kate ok?"

"Yeah," Sawyer nodded slowly. "She's still out cold though. They drugged us up pretty good."

"Kate's smaller," Jack said in agreement. "The drugs will take longer to wear off."

For a little while they didn't say anything but focused instead on getting their motor skills back up to snuff. There wasn't much to say- they knew they had been captured by the Others and were their prisoners. Not a whole lot to discuss.

"We are so fucked." Jack didn't cuss often, but, well, no other words seemed appropriate to describe just how much shit they were in.

"Thanks Cap'n Obvious," Sawyer scowled.

"And I've just figured out the worst part of it," Jack went on, ignoring Sawyer.

"Please do tell," Sawyer drawled.

"I'm stuck in a dirt room with _you._" He looked around desperately.

"Yeah, sorry 'bout that. I called up ol' Zeke and asked if we could schedule some male bonding time," he snapped sarcastically.

Their irritated conversation was cut short when Kate stirred and moaned on the ground next to Jack. They both shut up and scrambled towards her, Jack pulling her head into his lap and untied her gag. Sawyer scowled jealously. She yelped slightly and stiffened instantly, making a rather feeble effort to push them away.

"It's ok Kate," Jack said in his most soothing doctor's voice. "It's just us."

Her rigid body relaxed somewhat as she heard his voice and she groaned heavily, letting her arms fall listlessly to her sides. "Just relax Freckles, it'll take a while for the drugs to clear out," Sawyer said reassuringly.

"I'm thirsty," she rasped. Jack and Sawyer were also aware of the sticky, dry state their mouths were in. The gags had absorbed all the moisture in their mouths.

"Us too, sweetcheeks," Sawyer said, "but we got nothing right now. Hopefully those bastards'll come around with something sometime soon."

Kate rubbed her eyes and scooted over a little. "What do you think they want with us?"

"Something, hopefully. Then they'll have a reason to keep us alive," Jack added by way of explanation.

Sawyer looked alarmed at the prospect of _not_ being kept alive. "We gotta find a way outta here, and soon." He looked frantically for some way out. The room was rectangular, perhaps twelve feet long and nine wide. A there was a heavy looking metal door with a slot (for food, hopefully) to the front of the room and nothing but a dirty looking metal toilet to the back. The walls were bare save for something that looked like it could be a loudspeaker and a small vent. There was nothing above them except for the dusty, dim orange lightbulb. Sawyer scrambled up and over to the door, testing its strength by throwing himself into it.

Kate let out a horrified "Sawyer!" but Jack just rolled his eyes.

"Sawyer, relax. We can't even think about escape until we know what's going on here."

Sawyer shot Jack an angry look and banged his fist into the door one last time before sinking down to the ground in front of it.

"Jack's right. Sawyer. We have to get our bearings before we try anything," Kate said tiredly.

"_I'm glad to see you're all awake and conspiring already," _a cool female voice came out of nowhere. Kate started violently and all three of them looked around wildly. _"I must ask you to remember that you are at our mercy, and that any bad behavior of your will result in unpleasant consequences."_

Kate gripped Jack's arm, pupils wide.

_"We don't want to kill you- that would certainly be a waste. Quite the contrary- if you co-operate with us- not that you will have much choice- we will let you go eventually. You should be proud to be a part of this- your sacrifices will go towards the betterment of society and mankind._

Sacrifices? Sawyer gulped.

_"Meals will be provided for you and your health will be monitored. We'll let you settle in for now," _ the voice said, strangely pleasantly, _"but we'll be seeing you soon."_

The voice stopped and the captives sat in stunned silence for a moment.

"Anyone else get the feeling we're fuckin'_ lab rats?_" Sawyer muttered, confirming their worst fears.

A moment later several fruits, sealed ration packets and bottles of water fell through the slot in the door next to where Sawyer was sitting. He lunged for the little cat flap, but it was already closed and locked again. Instead he looked resignedly at the bottles of water and passed one to Kate first, then to Jack.

"High class establishment they got here," he said, examining his own bottle, which was branded with a familiar logo. "Dharma Initiative spring water." He raised his bottle in a mock toast and then opened it and drained it in three gulps. "Wonder why these sons o' bitches are hanging out in this shithole camp instead of our cozy little hatch?"

Nobody answered him, but Sawyer was pretty sure they all had their own suspicions on that point.

"I wonder what time of day it is," Jack said, looking around uselessly.

"We're underground, asshole," Sawyer snapped. "Seems you forgot to bring your heroically powered Rolex."

Jack opened his mouth to say something, but Kate beat him to it. "It's not going to help if you guys snap at each other all the time, ok? Please, just be _quiet_. I have a headache."

They fell silent instantly. Jack contented himself by giving Sawyer a dirty look.

Later they fell asleep on the dirt floor, all in shallow, uneasy slumbers.

---------------

The next day, they took Kate.

The arrival of the guard was preceeded by a message on the loudspeaker by the female voice. She warned them that an armed guard would be coming to take Kate away for an hour. She wouldn't be harmed, but if any of them tried to interfere, they would knocked out.

"Please, don't do anything stupid, you two." Kate looked at them desperately. "I don't want you to get hurt."

Naturally, it was Sawyer who ignored her warning. He lobbed a piece of fruit at the guard- the only thing at hand. The man had retaliated swiftly and butted Sawyer hard in the jaw with his rifle, knocking him out.

Jack watched in silent agony as Kate was dragged away.

Sawyer came to half an hour later, groaning and feeling his face.

"It isn't broken," Jack said quietly. "I checked. Do me a favor and save the heroic bullshit. We can't afford to do crap like that right now."

"Sorry that _I_ care enough to fight for her, Jack-o," Sawyer hissed.

"You know I care about her, you stupid hick." Jack fought to keep his temper under control.

"Well maybe next time you'll be a little more proactive."

"I'm trying to keep us alive and uninjured!" Jack said exasperatedly. "Unlike you, Sawyer, I've got _Kate's _best interests at heart here, not my own."

"Look, just because you're the 'morally superior' one here doesn't mean you're better than us."

"Us?" Jack raised an eyebrow.

"Me'n Kate." Sawyer paused to consider his next words. "We're good enough for each other."

"What are you getting at, Sawyer?" Jack sighed.

"She isn't good enough for you, Dr. Do-good."

"That's a really fucked up way to look at it," Jack said angrily, hot rage flooding him. "The way I see it, it's the other way around."

"Yeah, what else is new?" Sawyer asked, feigning boredom and picking at a scab on his hand.

Jack muttered some obscenities under his breath and fell silent once more. Sawyer had won the battle... and he had definitely started the war.

They said no more but waited in the dark, frustrated at their own inabilities to do anything to help Kate.

Twenty minutes later she was pushed back into the cell, exhausted and breathing heavily, dark circles of sweat on her clothes causing her to shiver.

She took two steps forward and collapsed.

---------------

AN: So, worth continuing? Drop me a line, I'd really like to know if you like it.


	2. II

**Chapter 2**

**AN**: Oh my gosh! I am really amazed at how fast people got into this. I put it up around midnight before I went to bed and woke up at ten o'clock with ten reviews already. (16 at the time of publishing! Thank you so much!)Thank you so much!

Alright… so far we have: **6** **Jaters** and **2** **Skaters**. The rest of ye-! Declare your allegiance. Anyone wanting to know what I am need not ask because the honest answer is that I'm neither. I swear. I love both and that's why writing this is so fun because I can do both as my mood suits me. Don't worry- there'll be plenty of action on both sides, and it will turn out one way or the other with a satisfying ending for the other person.

Just a response to **AnnPatrick: **I'm using my er, artistic license on that one. They won't get hurt if they behave… but really, who's going to behave? Those three? I think not.

On with the show!

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_Earlier_

The treadmill was easy for a while. Kate was going at a brisk pace, but nothing she couldn't manage. Two months on the mystery-frickin-island would make anyone physically fit.

As she ran, the teenage girl attached several wires coming off a monitor to her and then sat down and started scribbling.

After ten minutes, Kate was starting to get tired. She had only had one fruit to eat last night and some water. The girl must have noticed her fatigue, because she got up and _increased_ the speed of the treadmill.

Kate gritted her teeth but didn't say anything. She noticed the armed guard looking around, bored, and took her chance. She jumped off the treadmill and lunged at the startled guard, punching him hard in the face and trying to open the door.

Which was of course, locked.

That was her mistake. Her actions had been rash and not thought out. The guard promptly butted his rifle into her head- not hard enough to knock her out but hard enough to leave a bloody gash. Kate yelped and recoiled, giving the guard his chance to throw her back into the center of the room.

_Present_

"They told me if I tried something like that again they would kill one of the people at the beach until there were none left," Kate finished shakily.

Sawyer was rubbing lazy circles on her back, looking distraught.

"Oh god…" Jack muttered, burying his head in his hands and exhaling long and slow.

"They've got all their fuckin' bases covered, don't they." Sawyer said, now looking angry.

"They aren't half-assing or leaving anything out of their control," Kate agreed.

"Kate, you should drink as much water as you can stomach, slowly mind you, and then sleep, ok?" Jack said. "We don't know when they'll take you again."

"Or one of you," Kate said, feeling unbidden tears well up in her eyes. She swiped them away quickly. "Sorry," she whispered hoarsely.

"Don't be," Jack said, his anxious expression softening. "Just try and sleep, ok?"

Kate smiled a little and nodded gratefully. "You don't mind, do you Sawyer?" she murmured, letting her head droop onto his shoulder.

"Freckles…" he said, slightly alarmed, though pleased, that she had chosen him for a pillow. She never said anything back because she was already blissfully asleep.

Sawyer shot Jack a triumphant grin and a little wink.

---------------

Hurley ran like he'd never run before. Sure, two months on a deserted island with nothing to eat but fish and fruit would whittle a guy down, but he still wasn't exactly fit.

Today, it didn't matter. There was so much adrenaline coursing through his veins and egging him onwards that he never stopped once on the way back to the beach. There were only a few people who could help Jack, Kate, and Sawyer now, and he was anxious to find Sayid or Locke as soon as he could.

Still, the Others' ominous warning lingered in his head… they were not to come to _their _side of the island ever again- and now Hurley had no doubt about the things the Others were capable of.

The beach was in plain view now. People were huddled together in little groups; probably still speaking worriedly about the huge sound and flash they had witnessed just a day earlier.

Jin was the closest person to Hurley, so he made straight for him. "Dude," he started, panting. "I need _Sayid. _Where is Sayid?" Hurley said urgently, gesturing wildly.

Jin nodded in understanding. He said something in Korean and then, "Sayid, hatch."

"Thanks man!" Hurley exclaimed and ran off again into the jungle.

"Hurley!" Someone called as he rounded a tree. It was Locke, chopping some deadwood. "Where are Sawyer, Kate and Jack?"

"The Others… captured them," Hurley panted. "I gotta find Sayid…"

Locke nodded seriously. "He's in the hatch. I'll be there in a minute."

"Sure," Hurley said and took off again.

---------------

Kate was awoken rather violently by Sawyer shouting right beside her and a flash of light as the cell door was opened. Suddenly he was yanked up from beside her, her head snapping into the wall. Two armed guards were hauling him out of the room.

"Sawyer!" she screamed and lunged for him, but two strong arms wrapped her around the middle and yanked her backwards just as the door slammed shut again.

"Jack!" She yelled at him, infuriated and made to slap him in the face, but he caught her wrists.

"Kate! Stop it," his voice was deathly quiet. "You have a deep enough gash in your head as it is. You know that if we don't co-operate they'll hurt us or the people at camp. You gotta remember everyone there… Claire and Aaron, Sun being pregnant and everyone else there."

Kate relaxed a little bit and hung her head. "You're right. I know you are. I just don't want them to hurt you or Sawyer the way they hurt me."

"I know, Kate, I know. You just have to work on staying strong. Sawyer's a big boy; he can take care of himself, ok?"

Kate extricated herself from Jack's arms and sat down close beside him. "Ok. I just hate sitting around and not being able to do anything. You know I don't do this sitting duck thing too well."

"I know you don't Kate. Just remember we have to scope out the place first… find out exactly what they want with each of us. The best idea may just be to wait it out, as crappy an option as that seems."

Kate nodded, not willing to consider that one yet. "The others… I mean, our people… they're probably going to try and help us, right?"

Jack nodded. "Hurley went back. He knows where we are. That's really the best we can hope for right now."

Kate felt quite a bit more relaxed now. Sitting close to Jack, a feeling of peace came over her… like everything would turn out alright.

"Jack?" she said weakly.

"Yeah?"

"I couldn't think of a better person to be stuck in an underground cell with a bunch of mad scientists on a deserted island in the middle of nowhere with."

Jack smiled for the first time since they were captured. He started to laugh, and put his arm around Kate's shoulders, struck by just how ridiculous their predicament actually was.

---------------

"Sayid?" Hurley called into the hatch. Locke was standing behind him, looking wearing his usual wary expression.

Sayid emerged around the corner and hurried forward when he saw who it was. "Hurley!" he exclaimed. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah man, I'm ok. I've just been running."

"The others?" Sayid asked.

"The uh, other Others have them still. They only let me go to deliver a message."

"What was the message, Hugo?" Locke said, his interest immediately piqued.

Hurley looked at him distastefully for a moment and then said, "They sent me back to tell you not to go to their side of the island."

"Or what?" Sayid asked, looking dubious.

"I dunno, dude, but these guys are dangerous! I wouldn't be messing with them if I were you!"

"Hurley's right." Locke said. "We know that these 'Others' are capable of a lot of things and I don't want to be going onto their turf without a damn good plan."

"Yes," Sayid nodded. "But we are going to have to work quickly and quietly, perhaps do a little reconnaissance."

--------------

Sawyer was sitting in front of a table, hands bound behind his back. There was only one person in the room aside from the guard- the dark haired teenage girl, again with a clipboard and pen.

She looked down and read. "James Ford… also known as Sawyer. Thirty-five years old. That right?"

"Yeah," said Sawyer, irritated. "God, didn't know they had fuckin' child laborers in this shithole. How old are you, twelve?"

"I'm sixteen," she said coolly. "And shut up. I can tell him to hit you if I want."

"Well, fine then Jasmine. I'll play nice, but only if you get our your Barbies and serve me tea," Sawyer taunted.

The girl signaled to the guard, who slugged him hard across the side of his face.

"Mother_fucker_!" Sawyer exclaimed, spitting blood from his mouth and looking enraged.

"Look," the girl said. "I'm not planning on hurting you. All I want to do is a few tests and then you can go back to your cell, ok? Lets just get it over with."

Sawyer looked at her stiffly for a moment, but figured she was telling the truth. "Fine," he said. She was young, and Sawyer was very persuasive... maybe a few sessions like this and he could get her to help them.

She signaled again and the guard came forward with a blindfold and tied it tightly over Sawyer's eyes.

"There are three balls in front of you, James," she started.

"_Sawyer_," he corrected her.

"Sawyer. Fine, whatever. Each ball is a different color. Red, green and blue. I'm going to scramble the order of the balls, name a color and then ask you which position it's in: left, center, or right."

Sawyer sighed exasperatedly. "What the fuck kind of test is this? I'm not a fuckin' psychic and I certainly don' believe in shit like this."

"Everything is possible, Sawyer, if you apply the right kind of pressure. Now, tell me, where is the red ball?"

"In Notre Dame, Esmeralda," Sawyer rolled his eyes under the blindfold, knowing he was pushing it.

"Sawyer!" She said menacingly. "Come on!"

"Fine," he snapped. "Left," he said, picking one of the options at random.

The girl scribbled something on her clipboard and shuffled the balls. "Now the green one."

"You ain't even gonna tell me if I was right or not?"

"No," she said. "Green ball, Sawyer."

Sawyer sighed and answered left again.

This went on for a good three quarters of an hour; the girl asking, recording and shuffling, and Sawyer pulling answers at random out of the air.

"We're done for now. You did well."

The guard removed Sawyer's blindfold. "Well golly gee, thanks Jasmine."

"Stop calling me that. I don't even know what you're talking about."

"You never watched Aladdin?" Sawyer asked incredulously.

"I grew up here. I never watched anything." She said coldly.

"I guess Disney ain' exactly mad scientist educational material…" Sawyer muttered. "Well then, sweetcheeks, what is your name?"

She looked hesitant for a moment, but figured there was no harm in it. "Alex."

That was her first mistake.

---------------

Jack looked up as he heard someone unlock the heavy dead bolt in their cell door. Sawyer waltzed in, escorted by a guard, who promptly slammed the door shut again.

Kate stirred. She had fallen asleep again, but on Jack this time.

"You ok?" Jack asked as Sawyer grabbed a guava and some water and sat down.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Sawyer shrugged. "They didn't do to me what they did to Freckles here."

Kate let out a relieved breath and gave Sawyer a bone-crushing hug.

"Nice to see you too, Sassafras."

"They didn't hurt you?" Kate asked incredulously.

"Nope. Just blin'folded me'n did some weird psychic testing crap."

"What?" Jack said, not following at all.

"There were three different colored balls, and this chick wanted me to figure out what order they were in. That sorta thing."

"What did the woman look like, Sawyer?" Kate asked, wondering if it had been one of the people she had met.

"Hardly a woman, Freckles. She was really young. Sixteen I think. Name of Alex," he said offhandedly.

"Oh," Kate said, "she was there with me too, with a clipboard?"

"That's the one."

"Wait a minute," Jack interrupted. "Alex. Sayid told me about her. She's Rousseau's daughter. The Others took her pretty much right after she was born."

"We could use that to our advantage, you know." Kate said, suddenly interested. "Play her against the Others. Tell her about her mother and such."

"I can do it," Sawyer said abruptly. "I can persuade her. She wasn't gonna tell me her name but she did."

"Looks like your con skills are good for something, Sawyer," Jack rolled his eyes.

"It's a lucrative business, you hafta be good at it."

---------------

They talked late into (what they thought) was night- Jack filling Sawyer in about Alex. She was really their only way out, and only if they could persuade her.

Jack was still awake long after Kate and Sawyer had curled up on the dirt and fallen asleep. He was restless, in their stupid, tiny room.

Sawyer had fallen asleep curled up into a near-fetal position, his knees drawn up towards his chest and his hands curled up into his shoulder. It was interesting, though not unexpected, Jack thought, that Sawyer would sleep like that. Even in sleep he was still defensive and shielded. Jack had the fleeting though that he would definitely not want to wake Sawyer up from a violent nightmare.

Kate was sleeping in a little bit more of a relaxed pose on her side, legs splayed at the knees and hands sprawled out in front of her as if she were pushing someone away or trying to keep them at a distance. Jack wondered what he looked like when he slept.

She was dirty, her clothes were ragged and her tangled hair had fallen all over her face. Her lips were chapped and the gash on her forehead had turned a spectacular shade of purple.

It suddenly occurred to Jack that he had never, in all his years, seen anything more beautiful.

---------------

**AN**: So…. Locke, Sayid and co. are hatching up a plan, J/K/S are cooking up something too… and Jack, well, he's falling for Kate as you can see.

If you haven't already, let me know if you're Jaters or Skaters.

**Review**!


	3. III

Chapter 3

AN: Man you guys have me in a pickle! Seriously, if I pick one pairing, I'll lose half my readers! (Well, less than half if it goes Jate, since there seem to be more Jaters, which is kind of strange.)

**Anyways, here's my promise so that everyone (hopefully!) keeps reading. Kate will be with _both _of them (I know, sl00t! Haha, no, we love Kate.) at different points in the story. She is going to end up with one or the other, but there will be really cute romantic closure (with Kate!) for the other one right at the end, so it isn't really going to feel like just one pairing. It's really hard to describe without giving everything away, so don't give up! I just really, really want to stress that both parties are going to come out really satisfied, so please don't leeeeave me!**

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Kate awoke feeling remarkable comfortable for having slept on a dirt floor. There was something warm and relatively soft under her head. She sleepily opened one eyelid to investigate.

She was nestled cozily on her side in the crook of Sawyer's arm, one hand draped over his chest. She snapped open her other eye and couldn't help but feeling slightly annoyed. It was like her body had betrayed her. She got up slowly so as not to disturb Sawyer, who most certainly would have the balls to make this into an embarrassing scene. Jack seemed to be still asleep across the room.

"Well Freckles, how much did we have to drink last night?"

Kate jumped and then punched Sawyer in the arm. He was still lying on the ground, eyes closed, but smirking.

"Shut up, Sawyer," Kate snapped.

"It ain' your fault, sweet cheeks. It gets chilly at night here. We were just tryin' to warm it up…"

Kate 'tsk'-ed and sat up. "Your ability to be disgusting in the worst situations never ceases to amaze me."

"I guarantee you it'll keep us sane."

They sat in silence for a while. Jack was still out.

"I guess it's Jack's turn today," Kate said, drawing her knees up to her chest and looking worried.

Sawyer nodded. "They haven't really hurt us Kate. I know they worked you like a fuckin' dog and did some crazy mind shit with me, but they aren't trying to hurt us for the sake of it. Jack'll be ok. He's a big boy; he can take care of himself."

Kate snorted.

"What?" Sawyer asked, looking irritated.

"Sorry- it's just, that's exactly what Jack told me when I was worrying about you being gone."

"Aw, shucks, Freckles, you worried about big ol' Sawyer?" he said sarcastically, but was secretly pleased that she had worried.

"Of course I did," she snapped.

Their conversation was cut short by the cat flap in the door opening and some food falling in. Snatches of conversation could be heard while they pushed the food through.

"…Take Shepherd out. I want him on an empty stomach."

Kate gulped and quickly crawled over to Jack. "Jack," she whispered, "Jack, wake up. They want you."

Jack stirred and blinked warily just as the cell door was opened. "It's ok," he croaked, voice still raspy from sleep. He gave Kate's hand a strong squeeze and then stood up to be escorted out of the room.

---------------

Jack had barely exited the room when he felt something sharp prick his neck. "Fuck..." he muttered, knowing they had injected him with some sort of sedative. Dizziness overtook him and he swayed forward, knees buckling beneath him. The two guards caught him just before he hit the ground.

---------------

"Look Freckles, we got fish today!" Sawyer said, waving the still warm food enticingly under Kate's nose. She'd been strangely quiet since Jack left, not wanting to talk to Sawyer at all, just sitting stewing in her own misery and worry. "And there are some fresh, home grown papayas; why, I've never seen a more delicious lookin' fruit in my entire life!"

Kate had to smile a little at Sawyer's obvious concern for her. "If I didn't know better, Sawyer, I'd think you were trying to fatten me up!"

Sawyer shrugged. "You're a damn rail, Freckles."

"Sawyer likes fat chicks!" Kate teased.

"No, but I don't like starvin' ones," he made a face.

Kate snatched the fish, which had been unceremoniously plopped on a plate and shoved through the cat flap from Sawyer. She squinted at it in the dim light, tried her best to get the dirt off it, and ate voraciously.

Sawyer looked impressed.

"You have no idea how much food I can put away when I'm not stressed out, Sawyer," she said between mouthfuls.

"That's my girl," he said, opening up a bottle of water and taking a swig, feeling accomplished.

---------------

Jack came around slowly. Whatever drugs had been used to sedate him, Kate and Sawyer the other day seemed to be in his system again. He had that same feeling of extreme fatigue and heavy limbs. He was lying down on something hard, and a very bright light, much like the surgical lamps he had been around in the hospital, was suspended above him.

This time, though, he also had the sensation of tingling in his hands and feet. This, he found, was due to thick, leather restraints tied tightly around his ankles, wrists and middle. There was a heart monitor attached to him as well.

"Jack," said a male voice, "good to see you again."

Jack squinted and looked around the room. It was Henry Gale, complete with a lab coat and his dark, beady, sinister looking eyes.

"Henry," Jack croaked, "Henry Gale."

"You know that isn't my real name, but it'll do fine for now," he got up off the chair he was sitting in and went to a desk and pulled some syringes and vials from its drawers. "Fitting that you, _doctor_, are on my operating table now, at my mercy, after you locked me away, and I do nurse a bit of a grudge."

"I thought you weren't going to hurt us," Jack said desperately, pushing against his impossibly tight bonds.

"As sinister as we might seem, Jack, everything we're doing here is for the greater good. I'm not trying to hurt you, as much as I'd like to," he paused to look at Jack distastefully, "but I am literally going to make you a better man. The road to getting there is going to hurt, but I'm not trying to hurt you. Do you understand the distinction?"

"No," Jack said stubbornly, eyeing the syringe Henry was filling with distaste.

Henry shrugged and came over to Jack, flicking the needle. Jack paled and shrunk into the table as Henry made to inject him. He stopped short and his upper lip curled. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you were afraid of needles. How ironic." He found the vein in Jack's elbow joint and inserted the needle.

Jack made a strangled noise. It felt as if Henry had injected him with ice, so cold that it burned. The sensation quickly spread into the rest of his arm and then his entire body, leaving his muscles twitching and convulsing involuntarily.

"What... did you... do?" Jack choked out.

"Powerful cocktail of stimulants..." he started preparing another syringe. "You know what they say, Jack, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger."

--------------

Kate's good mood only lasted another hour. Jack had been gone much longer than her and Sawyer had been.

Kate had gotten up and was pacing back and forth across the length of their cell.

"Kate," Sawyer said exasperatedly, "_sit down. _You're gonna make me sick jus' watchin' you."

"Then close your eyes," Kate snapped, looking angry and scared.

"_Kate," _he said again, trying for a gentler approach this time. "Please, just relax. Jack is gonna be ok."

Kate's eyes welled up with tears, and this time she let them fall. "I just feel so useless!" she said, voice cracking. "I want to help him so badly!"

"I know baby, I do too, I honestly do," Sawyer said, and he meant it. He didn't hate Jack as much as he publicly expressed. They were rivals, of course, and he did find him annoying and too high and mighty for his own good, but he didn't hate him. And now this; trapped with only two other people in God-only-knows. That could bring anyone together, Sawyer reflected. That or make them try and kill each other, which wasn't really an option with Kate around.

"I hate this," she said, on the verge of hysteria, "I hate this. I hate this. We've only been here three days and I would already rather be dead."

"Don't say that," Sawyer said, anxiety instantly filling him. "Just don't. We gotta be strong. You gotta be strong for Jack."

"And you," she said, pausing to look at him.

"And me," he conceded, feeling touched. They looked at each other intently for another moment. "C'mere, Katie," Sawyer said, opening his arms to her. She didn't hesitate a second, but fled to him and let him rock her back and forth in his arms while she had a good cry.

When she had finished (and wiped her face on his shirt), she said, "Katie? That's a new one, Sawyer."

"Yeah," he said, looking at the ceiling embarrassedly, "it's a nickname, but it's still your name."

"Guess that must mean you like me," she smiled.

"Guess so," he said. "Guess so."

---------------

Sayid loaded a pistol and put it in the back of his jeans. "I'm going to find Rousseau," he called to Locke, who was sitting at the kitchen table of the hatch eating some dry cereal. "She may know more about the Others' camp than we do."

"You want me to come with?" Locke asked, putting down his spoon.

"No. You should probably stay here and keep an eye on things. I will not be gone long."

"Alright. Be careful that you don't shoot off a buttock." Locke said, smiling.

Sayid smiled. "I'll try not to."

----------------

Jack had never felt worse in his life. Every last muscle in his body left like it was on fire, making movement of any kind agonizingly difficult, especially as the guards half-dragged him back to the cell. His muscles burned but his skin was freezing cold, and sweat pouring unchecked from every pore in his body. All he wanted was sweet release; to fall asleep, or to be sedated again, but the stimulants in his system made sure that he stayed wide awake, eyes wide and breathing shallow and erratic. He also felt like he was going to throw up, but he had nothing in his stomach to expel.

The lights in the corridor were simply too bright for the drug induced, dilated size of his pupils and he was immensely grateful when the guard threw him back in the cell, where he hit the floor with an inhuman yelp and started shivering violently.

Kate blanched immediately when she saw the state Jack was in. Even Sawyer gulped audibly and muttered "Oh God…"

"Sawyer, get that strip of shirt Jack used on me the other day and drench it with water," Kate said, voice shaking and looking very pale. Every impulse in her was telling her to start screaming and crying, but Sawyer's words kept coming back to her. She had to be strong for Jack.

"I'm on it," Sawyer scrambled to comply. He'd never seen _anyone _look that bad.

"Kate…" Jack was babbling. "Oh God, Kate, Kate…" he reached out towards her, but she took his arm and put it down.

"Jack, shh, just try and relax, ok? Sawyer, give me the water bottle too." Sawyer handed over the drenched cloth and the rest of the water. "Jack," Kate murmured, dabbing at his forehead with the cloth, "just try and breathe ok? Deep breaths, in through your nose and out through your mouth, like you taught me, ok? Sawyer, can you help me here?" she was trying to prop Jack up on her crossed legs so that she could cradle his head and give him some water without drowning.

"Yeah, yeah, of course," Sawyer said, helping Kate lift the heavier man.

Kate opened the water bottle and brought it to Jack's lips. "You have to drink some of this, ok? You'll feel better, I promise." Kate kept dabbing his face with the cool washcloth. With the other hand she tipped some water into Jack's mouth. He coughed and spluttered, getting none of it down.

Jack was completely delirious. He was wide awake, but the room was spinning around him and there were faces floating above him. All he knew was that he was on fire, and that all he wanted was to die. He needed to die. But then someone was dabbing face, cooling the fire that burned there and whispering sweet nothings into his ear. It was Kate, and she was a beautiful angel and she could give him what he wanted.

"Kate, he murmured, "I want to die. Please, please…"

Kate simply looked alarmed.

"He doesn't know what he's talking about, Kate," Sawyer said reassuringly. "He's delusional." It was all he could offer at the moment. Kate seemed to have everything under control and Sawyer felt useless because there was nothing he could do to help her help Jack.

"I know," she said, and leaned down so that her head was at the same level as Jack's.

"Jack, she said quietly into his ear, "Jack, please drink." She pressed her lips to the side of his face and kissed his cheek softly, the first of a path of kisses to his ear, where she whispered softly to him and held the bottle to his lips again.

Jack calmed down immediately. He could feel her cool lips on his skin and her voice in his ear. Kate was an angel and if she would stay close to him forever he would do what the angel said and drink, so he did.

Sawyer watched in morbid fascination as Jack relaxed slightly and let Kate pour the water down his throat, doing his best to get it down. She was _amazing. _There was no other word for it.

"Kate…" Jack said, in a delirious haze, "don't leave. Don't leave me."

"I won't Jack, I promise," she murmured. "Never."

That night they fell asleep clinging to each other, and for once, Sawyer didn't mind or say anything snide because he knew that that was something he had never, ever experienced with another person.

He realized that Jack was in love with Kate, and Kate was in love with Jack, and that he was in… something, with Kate, and he didn't know if it was love because he had never loved anyone in his entire life.

---------------

AN: Wow, that was intense to write. I love it so much. Sawyer angst makes me sad. I love him. I love Jack. I was like "Nooo, what am I doing to him?"

I am so amazed by the volume of positive feedback I've received. Love for everyone… and please, REVIEW!


	4. IV

**Chapter 4**

AN: It looks as if the ranks of Skaters vs. Jaters are starting to even out… I haven't bothered to count again, but I think there are still more Jaters. Not as many as before, though.

**One thing I would really like to stress though… as much as I love you guys for reading, I'm writing this for me too, so I really want to follow my heart with the final pairing of this story. I have a scenario for either one… but one is just a lot better plot wise and gives me a really nice, solid ending that includes the other person, while the other pairing is not as strong. **

**I guess I really just want you guys to keep reading, because I think I can make it so that shippers of all ships can be happy in the end no matter what.**

Oh, and there is going to be some Skate (GASP! She's made up her mind! No, not really.) action in this chapter. Jaters… I know it's going to seem grim for the next few chapters- but there is going to be some major Jate happening too! Do not despair; Kate is up for that also. (Shameless Libertine plug)

Oh... and some kissing not related to K/S/J... ooooooooh.

--------------

Jack was better the next morning. He was slightly shivery and feverish, but he was fully conscious and coherent. Kate was sitting with him, plying him with food and water that he was rather reluctantly putting back.

"We mighta had some fish to give you too, Doc, but Freckles put it all away yesterday." Sawyer was making an effort to be nice to Jack.

Jack simply laughed, but Kate looked immediately guilty. "I didn't even think of that yesterday when I ate all that!"

"Kate," Jack said assuringly. "It's ok. Fruit is good. I like fruit."

"I knew it!" Sawyer said, unable to resist the obvious pun.

"Shut up, Sawyer," Jack said mildly. He felt good. Good in that he was with Kate, his muscles were doing what he wanted them to be doing and he didn't feel like the best thing in the world would be to put a shotgun to his temple and pull the trigger.

"Jack," Kate said, worriedly, "what do you think they were trying to do to you?"

Jack shrugged. "I have a few ideas. Henry told me that he was trying to make me a 'better man' and I don't think he meant it in a figurative sense."

"Whoa," Sawyer said, shaking his head. "That's got to be somethin' straight out of a comic book."

Jack nodded. "Yeah, sounds nuts, but it's actually pretty plausible."

"Wait a minute," Kate said, still not grasping what they were talking about. "They're trying to make you into _Superman_?"

"In a nutshell," Jack said. "I'm guessing they pumped me full of stimulants and steroids, things like that. I don't feel lethargic and just generally drained like I have for the last while. But this sort of things wears off eventually… which means they'll probably give me more."

"That's brutal, man," Sawyer said.

"Yeah," Jack agreed, "yeah, it is."

---------------

Sayid had been in the jungle for at least twelve hours now, trying to find Rousseau's latest hideout. It hadn't been easy work; he'd had to go from where he knew her last hideout was and tracked her from there. It was virtually impossible because her tracks were old and grown over.

But Sayid suspected a few things. Time as a "communications officer" had certainly fine-tuned his perception of the world. He knew she couldn't be too far- she would certainly be staying off "their" side of the island, and that the traps she set would lead him right to her, especially if he got caught in one again.

Another worrying thought came to mind- Rousseau had said that she had never seen the Others. Maybe not, but Sayid suspected she knew more about them and their whereabouts than she let on. Her search for her daughter must have taught her a few things about the goings on on the island.

Now, it wasn't as if Sayid had _planned_to get caught in a trap again. But Danielle had been so clever with her trip wires. She had put one directly under a rather badly hidden package of deadwood, suspended high in the canopy. Sayid stepped over it carefully and then knew his mistake. In front of the first wire was a second one placed in exactly the right spot. Sayid heard a snap as the heavy branches fell and then knew no more.

----------------

Three people were seated around a table, each of them with file folders and clipboards in front of them.

"Thank you for coming," Henry Gale said, peering at Alex and Bea Klugh, the older black woman who had monitored Kate during her testing.

"Alex, I'll start with you. How did Mr. Ford do?"

"Sawyer," said Alex, blushing slightly. She had taken a liking to the scruffy ex-con man. "He did better than expected. You were right about him probably having some innate psychic ability. He scored much higher than average, if you consider you have a one in three chance of guessing correctly anyways. I'd recommend letting me have a few more sessions with him, just so that I can do some more difficult tests."

Henry nodded. "He makes a good candidate for the project then."

"Yes," Alex said, "but we only have two candidates, so it's really a toss up."

"Alright. Thank you. Oh, and Alex?" he said, looking sternly at her.

"I want you to address Mr. Ford as such whenever you are working with him. "Do you understand? I don't want there to be any… attachments."

Alex blushed hotly again and looked at her feet. "Yes sir."

"Bea?" Henry asked.

Ms. Klugh looked to her file folders. "Ms. Austen did exceptionally well. She is extraordinarily physically fit and she certainly demonstrates enough sheer mental will to be used for the experiment. I won't be needing anything further from her except for a medical examination to make sure she is healthy and some DNA samples."

"Good," Henry said shortly. "Dr. Shephard adjusted to the drugs in his system remarkably quickly. The injections I gave him would kill most men within a day. A few more treatments similar to the first one and then injections for maintenance should be sufficient."

"Will these drugs… affect his ability to contribute to the project? Would they eliminate him as a candidate?" Ms. Klugh asked.

"I don't know yet. I hope not. Only time will tell, I suppose. I think we're finished here."

There was a scraping of chairs being pushed back and the rustling of files being closed. "Alex, please tell the guards to bring me Jack. The initial treatments have to be in quick succession to be effective. "

"Of course." Alex nodded curtly and hurried off to do Henry's bidding.

----------------

Sayid came about with a groan. His head was throbbing painfully. The last thing he remembered was looking up and seeing Rousseau's packet of logs tumbling towards him.

"Oh, Sayid," said a female voice sadly, "I thought you would know better by now."

Sayid's eyes fluttered open. Rousseau was standing directly over him peering down into his face with a look a mother might use when scolding a child. "My traps are designed to kill. You are lucky that one was not effective."

Sayid took note of his surroundings. He was in a small underground space similar to the one Rousseau had taken him to the first time she caught him. Light filtered through a hole in the ceiling, which was camouflaged with leaves and dirt. He was lying on a cot of soft moss and this time his hands were not bound.

"Danielle," he said, eyes flickering around, "I came to talk to you about Alex."

"Alex?" Rousseau said urgently, suddenly grasping his arm. "Have you found her?"

"I'm sorry, no, but we are looking for her. She may help us find our friends whom were captured by the Others."

Danielle looked away. "I can not help you. If I knew where she was, she would be here with me. Or I would be dead."

"So you do not know where the Others' camp is?" Sayid probed, knowing she was withholding something.

"No."

"Danielle," Sayid pleaded. "My job for years was to forcibly extract information from people. I know when they are lying."

Rousseau blanched. "Sayid, I cannot go there. I cannot."

"Why, why can you not go there?" Sayid said urgently. "Please, I must know. We may be able to save Alex as well."

"They will kill her, Sayid. If they see me in their territory, they will kill her." Rousseau's eyes were wide a fearful.

"You will not be seen. I only need you to tell me how to get there."

"Will you get my Alex back?" Rousseau asked, reaching out to touch Sayid's face gently.

"I don't know. I only with to speak with her for a few minutes, and that may involve kidnapping her from their camp. If I am successful, we may have a man on the inside to help up free our friends. Hopefully, Alex will see reason and come to see you again."

"Thank you, Sayid, thank you," Danielle said, not seeming to hear the part of the plan that entailed Alex only _maybe_ coming back. She pulled Sayid's head towards her and kissed his flush on lips.

----------------

Kate was virtually catatonic for hours after they took Jack for the second time. She didn't eat, drink or say a word. She just curled up into a little ball, knees to chest, and let Sawyer rub her back comfortingly.

Sawyer looked at her sadly. She just seemed so utterly distraught that there couldn't possibly be any space in her heads for thoughts of him. Just Jack. Jack was a lucky bastard, to get a woman like that. And the more he thought about it, the more Sawyer pined for her. Now there was a new word for him; Sawyer had never pined for anyone in his life. Sure, he could basically get any woman, married or not, between the sheets with a sultry look or low growl in a smoky bar. How ironic that the only woman he'd ever truly… cared for, was the one he couldn't have.

Sawyer was right. Kate was thinking about Jack… worrying about him mostly. It was so unbearable to see a man as selfless and kind as Jack and be hurt that badly. Being in a terrible situation like this didn't leave too much room for romance, but Kate couldn't help herself thinking back to her one and only _real_ kiss on the island. Sure, she had kissed Sawyer, and they had definitely been _really _kissing, but she barely knew Sawyer then, and had been being a real jackass then.

She had always felt so inferior to Jack- not because he was condescending in any way, but just because he was so _good_ and he was so strong for everyone else. But kissing Jack had been amazing… it was like meeting him on a whole different plane… because in that instant she discovered that he was a real person, with real pain and real desires and he desired _her,_ no matter who she was.

And then there was Sawyer, who she knew, though he had never admitted it had _always _wanted her for her- because he was no better than she was. She wondered what it would be like to kiss Sawyer for real… in real kissing circumstances, not as past of a bargain for stolen goods.

"Sawyer," Kate said, suddenly feeling the need to express her gratitude, "thank you."

Sawyer blinked twice, surprised that she was speaking again. "What for, Freckles?"

She shrugged and let her head fall onto his shoulder. "Just for being here. For _touching _me when no one else wanted to be near me. And just for being strong here and actually getting along with Jack. You have no idea how much that means to me."

Sawyer smiled, only a little miffed she had mentioned Jack in that nice thank you speech.

"I'll always be here for ya, Freckles. Always," he added quietly.

"Sawyer…" Kate said warningly, lifting her head off his shoulder.

"I know you've got eyes for the good doc, sweet cheeks," Sawyer said, giving her his best, most seductive look. "But I've got eyes for you, and you only. And since Jack-o is busy at the moment…"

Kate looked at Sawyer furiously for suggesting anything while Jack was away being tortured. But some part of her was secretly very pleased at Sawyer's confusing way of expressing his feelings for her.

Kate had always had the worst reactions to situations. She laughed during sad movies and cried during happy ones.

So naturally, furious as she was, Kate kissed Sawyer.

It was like their last kiss in that is was deep, open-mouthed, and passionate. Their mouths were seemingly fused together in a flurry of feeling and sensation. Every single nerve in Kate's body was tingling. She was _feeling_ something for the first time since kissing Jack.

She shivered lightly as Sawyer brought his fingertips to the back of her neck and trailed his hands lightly down her back. They were at a difficult angle; they had been sitting beside each other, against the wall, and had now shifted so that Kate was leaning over his knee.

At last they broke apart for air, bodies still twisted together awkwardly and foreheads touching. "Sawyer..." Kate said breathily, a hint of regret in her voice.

"Shh..." Sawyer said, opening his eyes lazily. "I know you have a thing for Jack. An' I want you to work it out whoever you chose. For now, I'll take what I can get, kay Freckles?"

Kate nodded wordlessly and bit her lip, touched by his understanding. Sawyer took the opportunity and latched onto her lower lip and they were lost to one another again in a haze of passion.

That was, of course, the very moment that a sweaty, trembling Jack stumbled into the room. He took one look at them, mumbled "Oh shit," and then passed out cold in a heap on the floor.

-----------------

AN: Crap. I love writing shit like that. Next chapter… Kate gets the cold shoulder from Jack. The Others put their plan into motion, and a certain crazy French woman gets (mostly) rejected.

JATERS HOLD ON-! THERE IS JATE TO COME!


	5. V

**Chapter 5**

**Please read this note… it's important. I wrote this note yesterday… and I thought I had my mind all made up as to the end pairing and I was going to drop the bomb.**

**But then I realized I wasn't being true to myself as a writer for picking that pairing. Jaters… you know what's coming, and I am really sorry. Either way I lose some readers, but I know that I'll be able to spin a better story if it goes Skate, because I really connect with Sawyer as a writer more than I do with Jack.**

**Skaters, rejoice. Jaters, please, I'd love it if you kept reading because Kate is going to be with Jack for a period of time and I promise the closure there won't come until the very end of the story, and it'll be good, I promise. I want everyone to keep reading, but I understand if you don't, all I'm saying is give me a chance.**

Oh, and with regards to the timeline in the story… I get the general impression they've been there for about a week, ok? I don't know how accurate that is, but deal. kthnxbye

----------------

Sayid's eyes widened in shock as Rousseau planted her lips forcefully on his. Normally, a woman like Rousseau would have interested him. She was intelligent and resourceful, if not a tad crazy. But the lingering memory of Shannon, so pale her skin was translucent as she died in his arms was more than enough to push Danielle away almost immediately.

She looked shocked, wounded and confused. "I- I am sorry. I don't know why I did that-"

"It's alright, Danielle," Sayid said quietly. "I know you have been alone without human contact for a very long time- and maybe one day we can pursue something more together… but right now we are pursuing other things… and it is too soon… since…" he couldn't quite get himself to say it.

"Since she died. That girl."

"Shannon," Sayid murmured. "How did you know about that?"

Rousseau shrugged. "I move around a lot. I hear things."

They were silent for a while, each lost in thoughts and memories. Finally Rousseau put her hand on Sayid's arm. "I am very sorry for your loss," she said.

"Thank you," Sayid said, glad to hear words no one had said to him for a very long time, since Nadia, since Shannon. "Thank you."

---------------

Kate was literally sick with worry all night. Jack seemed even worse than last time. He didn't sleep at all, just lay on the ground and shivered, eyes wide open and muttered incoherently. Whenever she tried to hold him or wipe beads of sweat away from his temples he would simply jerk away from her. Every time she thought back to that horrible look on Jack's face- something of disbelief and disappointment- she felt physically ill.

Finally she kept to leaning on the wall, looking on in silent agony as Sawyer gave Jack sips of water and wiped his forehead. It was worse because he didn't shrink away Sawyer, it was just _her, _like it was her fault that she and Sawyer had kissed and Sawyer was just a lucky bystander. She felt like she had betrayed Jack, and it was the worst feeling in the world.

And yet… she looked at Sawyer, tending to Jack so diligently and knew that he would do the same for her- and that he would literally kill for her. She didn't regret kissing him- it had been an experience beyond words, to know the real Sawyer that way.

Jack finally fell into a restless sleep in the middle of the night. Try as she might, Kate couldn't bring herself to do the same. She wanted more than anything to curl up beside one of their warm bodies and drift off, but Jack didn't seem to want her and she was too guilty to go to Sawyer, because she didn't really want to rub salt in Jack's proverbial wound.

"Kate, come here," Sawyer said, seemingly on the same page as her, "you're exhausted. You got circles under your eyes the color o' death."

"I- I can't Sawyer," she said, her sentence interrupted by a large yawn. "I'll just… nod off over here. I don't want Jack to see us again…" she finished softly.

Sawyer shrugged. "Freckles, the good doc is gonna be out for a while. Just have a little nap, ok? I'll wake you before he wakes up."

Kate considered for a moment and then nodded weakly. "Thanks Sawyer." She crawled over to him, lay her head in his lap and fell into an exhausted sleep.

Once he knew she was asleep for sure, Sawyer bent down and kissed her softly on the cheek, reprimanding himself slightly. When had he become so soft?

----------------

Locke was rummaging around in the store cupboard. He really, really, gotten tired of eating fruit all the time and the cereal that had been dropped was a welcome change.

There was just one tiny little problem.

There was no milk.

There was all manner of other canned and bottled drinks- concentrated juice pulp to be reconstituted, Dharma Initiative spring water, and the like. But no milk.

Locke scowled, picked up a can of orange pulp, did as the directions said and mixed it with water and poured it into his DI issue cornflakes.

----------------

Jack remembered everything that had happened the night before with disturbing clarity. He had taken in everything, his eyes and ears open. His brain just didn't seem to be able to send necessary signals to his muscles so that he could talk or move.

It was a terrible nightmare, like those horror stories med students always recounted about patients under anesthesia who could feel everything during an operation but weren't able to scream or move.

It was exactly like that, Jack thought. Like someone had drugged him improperly and then ripped out his still beating heart.

The drugs they had given him had been worse this time. There were more of them, and they left him in agonizing pain that would knock most people out, if the drugs weren't designed to keep him alert. He had been tied down again and all he remembered was Henry's smug face and beady eyes floating in and out of his line of vision as he plied Jack with drugs.

There was one period in the middle of the session of blissful unconsciousness… the time when Jack had officially contributed to the Hanso Foundation's view of the future, though he didn't know it yet.

The only light at the end of the tunnel was the knowledge that sometime, after all that, they would throw him back in the cell and Sawyer and Kate would be there and Kate would take care of him and just being around _her _ would make everything better.

Instead he stumbled in to witness Kate and Sawyer _kissing._ Not, nice, sweet, first kiss kissing, but real, passionate, take-me-right-now kissing. If his body had been responsive at all he would have turned around and walked right back to the torture room and lay down on the table.

And when they thought he had been sleeping, he had actually just been laying very still, willing his body to nod off, but he hadn't been able to. He didn't sleep a wink and he had to watch Sawyer and Kate cuddle the whole nightlong. He felt like a petulant child, and he didn't care right now. _He _ was the better man, damnit, and Kate should have chosen him. The funny thing was that he wasn't even mad at Sawyer- just at Kate. He was tired and drugged into a terrible state of wakefulness.

He pushed the thoughts from his mind and concentrated on being very still instead. Maybe it would all be better in the morning.

--------------

It wasn't better. Morning came and they took Sawyer again, leaving Jack alone with Kate.

He felt better in the morning… much better. Whatever was in his system made him feel stronger and more alert.

They were sitting in distinctly uncomfortable silence now, Jack tracing patterns in the dirt floor and Kate looking at her feet. "You feeling better this morning?" she asked, voice slightly strained.

"Yeah," Jack answered shortly.

"So, do you, um, remember what happened? You were pretty out of it."

"Yeah, Kate, I remember pretty well," Jack said neutrally, looking up at her.

"So do you know what they're doing, I mean, you being a doctor and all? I was really worried, and Sawyer was too." Kate was pointedly avoiding the inevitable. She knew he knew, but she didn't want to come out of denial just yet.

"Well, I used my doctor eyeballs to spy you _kissing _him."

Kate blushed hotly and turned away. "You weren't supposed to find out like that."

"Clearly not, Kate. Just tell me one thing: how long has this been going on?"

Kate snapped her neck to face him, nostrils flaring angrily. Jack recoiled. He was used to having the upper hand in conversations like this, but with Kate, that just wasn't an option. "How long has this been going on?" she raged at him, "How long _could _ it have been going on? You've only been out of this cell once before!"

"And since then you've already kissed, gotten engaged and ordered monogrammed towels with your initials," Jack snapped, temper rising in turn.

"Fuck you, Jack," Kate said quietly. "Please tell me why anything I do with Sawyer is any of your fucking business?" she asked in the same deadly tone of voice.

"Because I'm in love with you!" Jack burst out, instantly regretting his words.

Kate just looked at him in shocked silence. He couldn't detect exactly what the saw in her face… horror? Pity? Relief even?

"Oh my god…" he groaned, burying his face in his hands. "I'm so sorry you heard that."

"But it's true, isn't it Jack," she said, pressing him on.

He looked up, chin still resting in his hands. "What do you think?" he asked softly.

Kate nodded and looked down. "Look… Jack, you know I care about you, and I don't know if it's…love, but-"

"You care about Sawyer that way too," Jack finished for her.

"Yeah…" she said awkwardly. "Do you think you can… _feel _that way about two people at the same time?"

"I don't know, Kate. Maybe," he admitted slightly jealously.

"I- I just- Sawyer got there first, and I think we need to at least give things a shot before-"

"Kate, it's ok." Jack said, reaching out to touch her arm. "I understand. I'm sorry I acted the way I did."

"It's fine," she said, touched by his admission of love, and now, apology. "I know I've been playing both of you, and it's selfish of me, but I just don't know yet."

"I understand." He said, looking up and locking eyes with her. "And I'll be waiting," he gave her one of those looks of his that made her want to fling herself at him and run away at the same time.

----------------

Sawyer was back in the room with Alex again, blindfolded. She had set him to a much harder task this time, and he was getting quite frustrated. Instead of mixing the balls and asking which position a certain color was in, she now expected him to be able to describe the position of each ball in order.

He was very distracted, worrying about Kate and what kind of shit the doc would be giving her right about now.

"Sawyer, concentrate!" Alex would say crossly every once in a while. "I know you can do this. Believe it or not, you do have some innate psychic ability!"

Sawyer would growl and close his eyes beneath the blindfold once more. The only thing that seemed to work for him some of the time was to just imagine the balls, arranged randomly as him mind would have it and then tell Alex and hope he was right. More times than not, he was, and he couldn't help but feel slightly surprised with his own abilities.

When they were finished at last, the guard in the room removed Sawyer's blindfold. "Go get me the stretcher," Alex said, beckoning for him to leave.

"The stretcher?" Sawyer asked, slightly alarmed.

"Look, Sawyer," Alex said as soon as they were alone, "they just need some blood and DNA samples from you. They aren't going to do anything bad."

"Like they did to Jack?"

"Jack will be fine," Alex said dismissively. "Now, just sit still so I can sedate you. It'll be easier if you just co-operate."

Sawyer scooted away from her, intent on planting some doubt into her young, impressionable mind like he had discussed with Jack and Kate. "Tell something 'bout yourself, darlin'," he asked in tones he would only use while working a con, "were you born in this hell hole?"

Alex looked down. "I'm not supposed to talk to you about anything other than your testing."

Sawyer ignored her. "'Cause really, there ain' no one here as far as I can tell, who looks like your momma."

Alex shrugged. "They said I was a test tube baby. Some woman who died when I was a week old."

"And you believe 'em?" Sawyer asked, aghast at the extent of the lies they had planted in her head.

"Why would they lie to me about that?"

"What if your mummy dearest was still alive, and she wasn't part of this little organization?"

"Sawyer, don't be daft," she said, feeling nervous. What was he going on about.

"Your name, Alexandra, it's French," he pressed on. "Your mum is French, she still lives on the island."

Just then the man with the stretcher came in and Alex discreetly cuffed Sawyer on the back of his head to shut him up.

"You going to just let me give you this?" Alex asked, voice shaking.

"Nope," Sawyer shrugged.

It took them another fifteen minutes before he was finally sedated- but not before leaving the guard with a broken nose and black eye.

---------------

Alex and Henry bustled into the meeting room, where Bea was already waiting patiently. "Phase two is finished," Henry said. "Alex is getting to be quite the little doctor," he said dotingly, giving Alex a thin smile. She smiled back, but shrunk away, wondering if everything Henry had ever told her about her conception and her past was a lie. She hoped it wasn't- Henry and the others were all she had ever known, and she was content.

"Good," Bea said, consulting her papers. "Tomorrow we will complete phase three… and then only time will tell if we've succeeded."

"There is another matter I wish to discuss," Henry said. "The cell the captives are currently occupying isn't an ideal environment for the project to flourish. I would propose we move them to The Staff and resume operations there."

"The two men," Bea said, "do we really need them?"

Henry shrugged. "For a few more months, at least. We'll slowly wean her off them until she retains no memory at all."

"Why don't we just do that now? It will only require one dose of medication."

"Ms. Austen is an extremely strong willed individual. She needs the support of Mr. Ford and Dr. Shephard to get over the initial shock, for a while at least."

"Fine," Bea said in agreement. "I'll make the arrangements."

-----------------

**AN: dundundun. What are they going to do to Kate? I have dropped a few fairly obvious clues. About Sawyer's little roll in the hay with Ana Lucia… it'll be addressed later.**

**I just feel so much better about this now that I can write in whichever pairing I want. It just flows better; I really hope you guys understand. It's going to be a great story for Jate lovers to, so I really hope you guys keep reading.**

**Hobbits on the island: I put in that little Locke scene just for you. Don't lose hope, Locke will eventually find the meaning of life _and _ some milk for his cereal.**

Oh…. And there was a Buffy quote in there… catch it and I'll give you your very own clone of Jack or Sawyer.


	6. VI

Chapter 6

AN: Thank you so much to everyone who's stuck by and still reading. I hope you like this chapter- it really gets the plot going.

I know this has been so long in coming... I started the IB program at my school, which for those of you who don't know, is basically a really challenging program. It's kills. There's a LOT of work, so updates are coming more slowly.

Lostf4natic: Thank you so much for your reviews. I think they're the best ones I get and they really make me want to keep writing and make the story better. I will definitely take your suggestions to heart.

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Sawyer was still quite groggy from the sedative they had given him when they pushed him back in the cell. He was quite out of it, but he did notice the depressed, awkward mood in the air. "You guys have a nice heart to heart?" he mumbled, sliding down to the ground.

"Yeah. We're ok," Kate said placatingly, going to help Sawyer lie down properly.

"For now," Jack added darkly. Kate gave him a warning look and went back to tending to Sawyer.

"What did they do this time, Sawyer?" Kate asked.

He shrugged slowly. "More testing. Then they knocked me out. Alex said they just wanted to do some tests or somethin'. I told her 'bout her mum." Sawyer smiled lazily.

"That's good Sawyer," Kate said, and sat down beside him, confident he was ok. She knew Jack had rather reluctantly given her the go-ahead with Sawyer, but she didn't want to rub it in his face because it would be terrible for him. But at the same time, she wanted to be able to be openly with Sawyer. He had changed so much since they crashed… she remember back to the snide, scruffy southern con man who had pretended to steal Shannon's medicine and hoarded things people needed… and now- the amount of support he had given her since they'd been captured, his effort to get along with Jack and to get Alex to help them.

But what if she had totally missed her chance with Jack? What if 'being' with Sawyer was a mistake? How could she even be with him in these circumstances? What if, what if, how, why, when. Kate just shook her head and pushed the thoughts away. Right now, their number one priority was to stay alive.

---------------

Dusk had fallen and most of the Others had settled into their tents for the night, eager to leave the trials of the day behind and rest. Alex couldn't sleep, though. She was sitting on the ground at the edge of camp, eyes darting around restlessly, brain furiously at work.

She didn't know why what Sawyer had said about her mother had struck such a chord in her. She had always wondered about the woman who was supposedly her mother… and what her life here would be like if she hadn't died in childbirth. But it had never been that much of a concern for Alex. She had always had Henry and Bea and all the Others who lived here and they had given her everything that she needed. Sawyer was probably just trying to scare her into letting them go or to try and get her to work against her own people. She knew that.

But what if he wasn't lying? What if her mother was still alive somewhere out here? Would she still think about the daughter she had lost almost sixteen years ago?

Alex got up, feeling restless. Usually she wouldn't stray far from camp; it was forbidden unless she was going on some sort of research mission, and was accompanied by an adult. But it was late. No one was awake still… and she wasn't planning on going far. So she padded quietly into the trees, intent on enjoying the tranquility and having some time alone with her thoughts.

The normal nighttime noises of the forest had never bothered Alex; she had never known anything else. The trees rustled slightly in the breeze, sticks broke beneath her feet and hidden creatures scurried away as she approached.

That's why she never noticed the dark haired man creep up on her silently, put a hand firmly on her mouth to muffle her startled scream and drag her into the night.

-----------------

That night in the cell was spent in very uncomfortable silence. Kate sat beside Sawyer against what would be the left hand wall of the room if you were to stand in the doorway and look in. She wasn't touching him; she was sitting with her arms crossed and her lips pursed together in a thin line. Jack was sitting in his usual spot across from them, in the back right hand corner of the room. He was sitting stock still, and like Kate, concentrating simply on breathing and trying not to think about anything that was going on.

Something was different with his body. He didn't want to admit it, but whatever they had done to him made him feel _good. _He couldn't explain it, and he didn't want to, because as a doctor he found the entire matter severely disturbing. But he was much more alert now, he needed much less sleep and his entire body just felt… _powerful. _ There was no other way to describe it.

The awkward silence was abated somewhat when Kate declared that she had to pee. "Yeah, and?" Sawyer asked, smirking.

"I want you to turn around," she snapped, blushing hotly. "It certainly wouldn't be the first time I had to go."

"I bet yousneak looks at _my_ ass, Freckles" he said accusingly.

"I do not. Just shut up and don't look."

"Fine, fine," Sawyer acquiesced and did as he was told. Jack shuffled around too.

When she had finished she sat back down beside Sawyer again, a little closer. "Did ya use soap?" he deadpanned.

She smacked him lightly. "You smell," she said, too tired to think of anything better.

"You don't smell too much like roses yourself sweetheart," he smirked.

"Do you two want to shut up?" Jack snapped darkly.

"Gee, sorry, were we disturbing you while you were cookin' up a master plan or somethin', doc?" Sawyer shot back.

Kate shrunk into the wall, feeling deflated as her lighthearted mood slipped away again.

----------------

Sayid dragged Alex backwards into the jungle, annoyed, but also impressed with the fight she was putting up. But of course, this slight sixteen year old girl was really no match for Sayid. They didn't have far to go before they got to the spot just outside of the Others' territory where Rousseau was waiting.

She had been very helpful; she had told them all of the places around the territory where they Others posted the fewest sentries and when they changed shifts. That was why he was annoyed with Alex's struggle; they had only a few minutes to get out of the general area. Sayid was armed of course, but he did not want to endanger Rousseau or any of the people back at camp by breaking their 'agreement'.

So, imagine his luck when Alex came wandering out all by herself on a night when Sayid was only planning on taking a look around. He seized his opportunity, snuck up quietly on the girl and nabbed her. He sincerely hoped she was the right one, but he didn't think the Others had too many other dark haired teenage girls in tow.

"I'm not going to hurt you," he hissed quietly. "I just want to talk to you for a minute," he released his grip around her whole body and took his hand off her mouth, but keeping the other clamped tightly around her wrist.

"Let me go!" she yelled, "I'll scream!"

Sayid clapped a hand on her mouth again. "If you scream, I swear that I will kill you," he said, dead serious. "I tortured people in the army for years, so believe me when I say that I could kill you and sleep soundly tonight if it were not for your mother, who is waiting for me a few hundred yards from here. So I would advise you to be very, very quiet. Do you understand?"

Alex nodded quickly, eyes wide with fear and wonder. "Are- are you from the plane crash?" she asked when he had taken his hand off her mouth.

Sayid shrugged. "Where else?"

"There have been others," Alex said.

"Like your mother," Sayid said.

"My mother died when I was a baby. I was born here, with the Dharma Initiative," Alex said, sounding much more sure than she felt.

"Wrong," Sayid said with complete conviction, still half-dragging her through the forest. "Your mother's name is Danielle. She and her science team shipwrecked here sixteen years ago. 'Your' people took you when you were barely a week old."

Alex didn't say anything. She just gulped. How could Sawyer and this man say the same thing about her mother? Of course, they had been on the plane together, but none of them knew Alex personally until about a week ago. It just didn't fit, unless they were telling the truth. Which they weren't, Alex reminded herself. They weren't. Really.

Sayid suddenly stopped walking. "Danielle," he called softly. "Danielle, come out. I brought Alex."

Alex looked around nervously, unable to see anyone. For a moment nothing was heard, and then the bushes rustled and a thin, ragged woman with long dark hair and impossibly sad eyes drifted out of the bushes.

"Alex?"

---------------

_The next morning…_

Jack, Kate and Sawyer were all asleep when the Others came for them. They were all hauled to their feet roughly, each blinking and trying to shield their sleepy eyes from the bright white light that was pouring through the open door.

Henry Gale stood in the doorway, watching with an expression of satisfaction and the prisoners were roused. "Take them to The Staff," Henry said disinterestedly, his beady eyes lingering on Kate. "Except for her. Take her to my lab."

Sawyer and Jack watched helplessly as Kate was dragged in the opposite direction. This was different from anything the Others had ever done. They had always been taken one at a time… and none of them had heard anything about 'The Staff'.

A sudden wave of hot, all-encompassing panic filled Kate. "Jack!" she screamed desperately, "Sawy-" the guard clapped a hand over her mouth just as the other two were pushed out of sight and she didn't get any sort of response from them.

Kate just went limp and dissolved into terrible, anguished tears, letting the guards drag her shaking body down the hall.

----------------

Kate's screams echoed in Jack's ears long after they had been ushered out of the underground building and into the unbearably bright afternoon sun. It was the first sun and fresh air he had seen for at least a week, but he found he couldn't enjoy it at all. He glanced over at Sawyer, who looked quite pale and was wearing an extremely unsettled expression.

But God, that scream- it had been so blood curdling, so haunting. It was the same kind of scream that Kate had uttered their second day on the island, when they had been running away from the cockpit and the monster and Kate thought he was dead. Even though she had known him for less than forty eight hours, it seemed like a major loss. And now... God. Now it was even worse.

But the thing that bothered Jack the most was that fact that him and Kate had parted on such terrible terms. He had been sad and bitter and angry at her for choosing Sawyer- and now all he wanted was for her to be safe, for those monsters to keep their filthy paws off. He didn't care if she never looked at him again, as long as she was safe and happy and didn't hate him.

Sawyer was putting up a little bit more of a fight. He struggled and cursed the whole way, earning himself a new bruise on his face, until they were cuffed to the back of a dusty jeep and blindfolded so that the Others could keep their location secure. The feeling of dread in him was so awful that he thought he was going to throw up. He had never, _ever _felt so protective of a woman in his life. Right then and there, he made a silent vow to himself that if Kate came out of there with a single scratch on her body, he would kill every single one of those bastards and have no regrets.

Approximately a half and hour later, the vehicle lurched to a stop and Jack and Sawyer were uncuffed, but left blindfolded. They were escorted at gunpoint through a door and down stairs. Judging by the cool, dry air, they were most certainly underground again, though it smelled different. Instead of smelling tinny and dusty, Jack's nostrils were invaded by a pungent scent he knew only too well- that of a sterile hospital.

Their blindfolds were pulled off, revealing to them a narrow, white hallway with doors to either side. The walls were of painted white metal with tinges of rust, but it was otherwise spectacularly clean. Sawyer's eyes darted right to a door labeled "escape hatch", but he was smarter than to make a move at gunpoint.

What sadists, Jack thought, when they opened a door directly across the hall from the escape hatch, and pushed them in.

Sawyer inhaled sharply. This place was unlike anything they'd ever seen during their stay with the Others. It was like a fully furnished apartment, though a little small.

Jack and Sawyer drifted around, getting their bearings. Directly beyond the door there was a small sitting room with a table, books and couch, and also a small refrigerator and pantry. A door beyond that led to a small washroom and another to a bedroom that was furnished with two single beds and clean linens.

"Oh my God," Sawyer muttered, inspecting the bedroom. "Where the fuck are we? Jack?" he called, when there was no answer.

Jack had collapsed on the couch and was sitting with his head in his hands.

"Doc," Sawyer said cautiously. "You should take a look around. Much better than the old digs."

"I don't care, Sawyer," Jack said. "I just don;t care about anything right now."

"Look," Sawyer said gently, unsure of how to express to Jack that he felt the same way. "I know it doesn't matter. None of this matters if they do somethin' to her. But we gotta stay strong, because they might shove her in here in a few hours and she might be even worse than before, and she can't see us like this."

Jack didn't say anything, but he took a deep breath and looked up. As much as he hated to admit it, Sawyer was right. He had to get his act together.

Sawyer took this as acceptable progress. "I'm going to have a shower."

"Yeah," Jack said. "After I finish." He pushed Sawyer onto the couch, made it to the bathroom in the three long strides and slammed the door.

Jack was back.

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Make my crappy start of the school year better by reviewing!


	7. VII

Chapter 7

AN: Thanks again for reviewing. :). Anyways, what happens to Kate is gonna be totally anti-climactic. Hehe. For a while, anyways... this chapter is going to be pretty emotionally charged.

And it's shortish, I apologize. The things I have planned for the next chapter just didn't fit in with what was going on here. Sorry!

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Kate woke up feeling completely refreshed. She was lying unbound on a comfortable leather chair, much like one that would be found at a dentist's office. She flexed her limbs experimentally, thinking back to the last thing she remembered... just being pulled into the room she was in now and a slight prick at her neck.

"Ah, Ms. Austen," Henry Gale looked up from the sheaf of papers he was leafing through at his desk. "Good to see you awake," he said, eyeing her with satisfaction.

Kate's feeling of general contentment evaporated at the sight of him. "What did you do to me?"

Henry shrugged. "You'll find out on your own in due time."

Kate just gave him a horrified look and sat up abruptly, feeling panic overtake her. "Where are Sawyer and Jack?" She looked around, as if they were hiding somewhere in the room.

"I'll have someone escort you to them." Henry got up and opened the door to reveal two guards waiting. They took her by either arm and started to lead her away. "Enjoy the time you have with them while it lasts," he said with the utmost glee, "because it _won't_."

Kate paled considerably. "How long?" she asked, like a patient who was terminally ill asking how long they had to live.

"Two weeks. Maybe three," he said indifferently as they dragged her away. "Only until we know the experiment has been a success."

----------------

Alex wandered back to camp in a complete daze. Her conversation with Danielle… the woman who believed so completely that she was Alex's mother… the thought still boggled her mind.

Alex wasn't really sure what to believe… it was hard to throw away sixteen years of history with _her _people. There were people she had seen every day for as long as she could remember- people who had been like parents, siblings, friends. She knew that if she told Henry about Danielle he would deny it, punish her for leaving camp and have Danielle killed. And what on earth would she say anyways? By the way, Henry, I was just wondering if everything you ever told me about my parentage was a lie. Is my mother really a crazy French woman and did you take me away from her when I was barely a week old? Oh, and we're low on guavas, shall I go pick some?

Alex sighed. She still had her doubts, but some part of her knew that Danielle was telling the truth… and that disturbed her greatly. The way the woman had spoken about her past… recalling her shipwreck and the details of Alex's own capture sixteen years ago in great detail left little room for doubt. It was as if it had been all she thought about for all those years.

No, this was definitely going to take some more discreet nosing around. And she was going to have to do it quickly. That woman… Kate… what they were doing to her seemed to be worse and worse to Alex with every passing minute. She could see how her own organization had ruined lives, and she wasn't sure that what they were doing was in the right anymore.

----------------

Kate felt worse than she ever had throughout her entire ordeal. It was terrible… she felt like she was going to be violently ill and she wanted to scream and cry and she had no doubts that if someone handed her an opportunity and a gun, she would kill Henry Gale. His uttered warning… a time limit with the two men in the whole wide world seemed to be worse than just killing them or taking them away right then. Because now, no matter how good their time together was, every single moment, every word, every action, was shadowed by a feeling of complete and utter helplessness. They were doomed, in every sense of the word.

Her armed escorts stopped at last in front of a rust tinged white door, and for the umpteenth time, Kate was pushed inwards, towards the best and worst things in the world.

The sight of the room and all its modern conveniences took her breath away. It was like the hatch, only smaller, and it contained one very solemn looking Jack. Kate felt her breath catch in her throat at the absence of someone very important. "Where's Sawyer?"

Jack's neck snapped around, eyes wide in shock. He had been so absorbed in his own misery he hadn't heard Kate come in. "Kate! He exclaimed getting up from what served as their kitchen table and rushing to hug her. She squeezed back hard for a moment but then sniffed and pulled away, looking at him urgently. "Where is Sawyer?" she asked again, on the verge of tears.

Jack looked disappointed for split second. "In the shower."

Kate exhaled the breath she was holding in, feeling vastly relieved. She glanced around the room and sunk onto the couch, trying her very hardest not to think about what Henry had said. Just the idea of placing a limit on her time with Jack and Sawyer was awful. She just stared straight ahead and tried not to move, trying to get a hold of herself again.

"Kate," Jack said quietly, "what did they do this time?"

She just shrugged. "I don't know. They knocked me out."

Jack started bustling around her, checking for signs of injury. "Jack!" Kate snapped. "Stop it. I'm fine."

Jack straightened up, taken aback. "Sorry- we were just really worried, Kate."

Kate drew her knees up to her chest and didn't say anything. She didn't know what had triggered her change in mood. She suddenly felt petulant and angry with Jack for no apparent reason, whereas fifteen minutes ago she would have killed to have five more minutes with him. There were so many things she wanted to say in case she never got a chance to say them- things she didn't want to admit to herself. Like how she was sorry, because no matter how hard they tried or how much she wanted it, they could never be together.

Kate's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a door opening and a slightly damp Sawyer walking out, wearing only his jeans. "Doc," he said, not noticing the little ball that was Kate curled up on the couch. "You found any clothes yet?"

"Sawyer?" Kate uttered, getting up and turning to face him.

A similar sense of overwhelming relief flooded Sawyer at the sight of the scruffy woman in front of him. "Katie," he said gruffly, opening his arms and reluctantly letting emotion overtake him. She had been gone barely three hours, but the uncertainty and change of setting made it feel like a lifetime.

In a split second she was in his arms, finally letting the waterfall of tears she had been holding back for the last week and a half overtake. She sobbed inconsolably into his chest while he rocked her back and forth and stroked her hair and whispered quietly to her.

Jack looked on, feeling a profound sense of loss, and quietly retreated into the bedroom.

----------------

_Earlier_

Danielle drifted towards her daughter, staring in wonder. Sure, sixteen years alone on an island in the middle of nowhere would loosen a few screws in anyone's head… but this… the girl before her, was her own flesh and blood. Rousseau reached out and traced the contours of Alex's face, marveling at their similarities.

Alex flinched slightly but didn't back away. It was all very hard to take in; all the common sense in her was screaming that this was some sort of a plot- this woman was crazy, and the man with her just wanted to use her to get to Jack and Sawyer and Kate. That part was probably true, but what if this woman was really her mother? Nobody could act _that _well, and the possibility was too large to dismiss.

Sayid looked on with interest. It was… _nice_ to witness a moment like that. Alex looked uncomfortable but distinctly curious as Rousseau wrapped her in a bone-crushing hug.

"Danielle," Sayid said quietly. "Perhaps you should explain some things to Alex."

Rousseau let go of her daughter. "Yes, yes, I should."

Alex sat on a fallen log as Danielle began to recount her tale… it was so harrowing. It must have been awful for this woman to lose her child… how they had taken the baby and then her team, her husband, Alex's father had gotten sick and died. And if that child was her, well, that was a possibility she didn't want to consider yet.

When she finished, Alex got up and looked, panicky, from side to side, feeling overwhelmed. "I- I have to go…"

Danielle's face fell slightly.

Sayid decided to intervene. "Alex, you have a lot to think about. Perhaps we should meet again in a few days time."

"Yeah," Alex said quietly. "Yeah, that would be good."

"Three days," Sayid said, and Alex nodded, taking another look at them before bolting back towards her camp.

"Alex!" Rousseau called after her in anguish, making to follow her. Sayid caught her. "Danielle, it's alright. She will come back, I promise."

Danielle collapsed into sobs; something Sayid had never seen her do. He held her like it was the most natural thing on earth until she relaxed somewhat.

----------------

_Present_

Sawyer pulled Kate onto the little couch, letting her indulge herself in a fit of hot tears. "It's ok, Freckles. You're ok. I'm ok."

Kate sniffed and looked up, wiping her eyes. "Sorry- I just- I don't know." She was so relieved to be back with Sawyer.

"'S ok, baby. But I already had a shower, you know," he said, jesting. Kate smiled a little and hiccupped. "Sorry," she said sheepishly.

"You might think about havin' one too," he said, wrinkling his nose at her and smiling.

"Shush," she scolded, distinctly aware of her own griminess, "I'm going."

"I'm not invited?" he asked, pretending to be hurt.

"You already showered," she reminded him teasingly.

"Damn. Well, next time I'll wait for you," he waggled his eyebrows and Kate laughed, something he hadn't heard her do in ages. His chest swelled a little to know he could make her laugh, even in the mother of all situations.

She got up and made off towards the bathroom, but Sawyer caught her gently by the wrist. "Katie," he murmured. "You ok?" he asked, meaning to inquire about her recent absence. She had seemed fine upon entering… but upon closer inspection he noticed something different, almost worse than physical harm. An extra measure of sadness had been added to her eyes, making her look haunted and anxious.

"Yeah," she lied, "I'm fine." She felt so grateful to him, for his support even while Jack was being a jealous bastard. Kate couldn't think of any words to express her feelings… and she felt guilty that she hadn't told him what Henry had sad… so she just leaned forwards and kissed him fervently.

Kate felt her knees weaken as Sawyer took some initiative and coaxed her mouth open, sweeping his tongue luxuriously across her bottom teeth. It seemed he had found some toothpaste, because his mouth was minty, cool and something that was uniquely Sawyer. His hands came up to either side of her face to feel her soft skin and mussed locks.

She broke away for lack of air, but didn't open her eyes. She just stood there with a smile and bit her lip like she did when she was worried or pleased and slightly embarrassed. Sawyer sincerely hoped it was the latter. "Still not invited to that shower?" he asked huskily.

"Nope," she said, padding away and leaving Sawyer with nothing but a raging hard-on and a sincere wish for another shower... this time a _cold _ one.

He sighed, got up and went to investigate their new flat. They had a tiny pantry, stocked with Dharma Initiative canned goods, boxes and local fruit. Nothing of interest, really. Sawyer pushed aside several cans of condensed milk, looking for something sweet.

----------------

Kate turned on the lights in their tiny bathroom and gazed around. It wasn't much; just a shower, toilet and sink crammed into a few square meters of space. She started the water and started to peel the grimy clothing she had been wearing unwashed for the last two weeks off. What a sight she must have been in their clean, almost overly sterile lodgings. Her face and arms were caked with dirt and the rest of her wasn't looking much better.

She hadn't been eating well for anxiety, and it showed. It wasn't for lack of food; she just had no appetite. Every single one of her ribs was disturbingly prominent and her face was hollow and gaunt. A fresh surge of anger flooded her anew, at everyone, everything, for the bastards here who had done god-only-knows to her. But the most disturbing thing, she reflected, was that it was all her fault for making the choices she had made to land her on this god forsaken hell hole. All her fault.

She threw her clothes and Sawyer's shirt, which had been carelessly dropped onto the floor into the shower to get the stench out of them. Then she stepped in herself, turned the water as hot as it would go and tried to scrub every inch of dirt and loathing and fear and hatred from her body until her skin was red raw and hot, angry tears flowed down her cheeks, camouflaged by the cascade of water.

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AN: Kate angst, Jack angst, Sawyer not-so-much angst. Family reunions, milk, and cold showers. What a ragtag chapter that was. Only the last bit really flowed. I hope it's not too bad. I know you _still _haven't found out what the others did to Kate, but I didn't want to rush it. It wouldn't be realistic and I didn't want to speed the story along too much.

Review. Please. I love you…!


	8. VIII

AN: Dark days for Jack, here guys. Sawyer and Kate get it on. Enjoy it while it lasts, cause even though this is going to end out Skate, there are going to be some dark days for our fave pair.

Chapter 8

Alex didn't sleep at all that night. She snuck back into camp and lay awake for the rest of the night in her tent, just thinking.

All her life she had been around members of the Dharma Initiative, though technically now defunct. They had been working to accomplish what they had originally set out to do- change the core values of the Valenzetti equation- 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42. These values predicted the date and time of Armageddon using a very complex mathematical algorithm. As best as Alex understood, numerous failures and few results caused the Hanso Foundation to stop funding Dharma. However, Henry had several important contacts outside of the Hanso Foundation and was using their resources to continue the project and get back into the good graces of Alvar Hanso.

Alex had never been off the island. The closest she knew of the rest of the world was what she had been taught in books and seen in pictures. Occasionally someone would sail to the island to bring equipment or other necessities, and the occasional gift, but that was it.

Alex frowned. According to the atlases she had seen there were hundreds of countries and billions more people on the world. She had never really cared before, but suddenly she felt cheated. If this was an ordinary island, and she and her "mother" had really shipwrecked here, and they were rescued, wouldn't she be leading a completely different life?

Alex opened the flap of her tent, suddenly feeling claustrophobic.

Someone was sitting near the tree line about a hundred feet away. Alex leaned forwards, squinting, and trying to see if it was someone she knew. None of her people had a profile like that… seemingly very tall and thin. For the second time that night, Alex snuck out of her tent and towards the figure. It was a woman, a few years older than Alex.

She approached silently, wanting to investigate without alerting the woman to her presence. It had to be one of the people who were on the plane. As far as she knew there was no one else on the island except for them and… Danielle. What on earth was one of them doing here?

Alex winced as a twig snapped under her foot. She stopped dead in her tracks, hoping the woman hadn't heard. She did. She turned her head slowly, seemingly not surprised at all. They stared at each other for a few long moments before the other woman beckoned to Alex to come closer.

Alex gulped and took a tentative step forward. She had no idea what she was doing, but this felt… right somehow. She took another step, and then another, slightly horrified, but her legs seemed to be disconnected from the part of her brain that reasoned.

Coming closer, she took in more details about the woman. She had blonde hair to her shoulders and was wearing a shirt that was covered in blood. Her face was turned into the moonlight and her hands were resting on her impossibly long legs. She was quite beautiful, even dirty and covered in blood.

"Hi," the woman said, smiling a little bit.

"Hi," Alex uttered, coming to a stop directly in front of the blonde.

"Sit down," she said, patting the ground beside her.

"Ok," Alex whispered, slowly sinking to the ground beside her, rational part of her brain screaming not to. "Were you on the plane?"

"Yeah," the blonde woman said, looking almost wistful. "Yeah, I was. You weren't though."

"No," Alex said. "What are you doing here?"

The woman shrugged. "Just looking around." She shifted so that her knees no longer blocked the view of her stomach. Alex gasped. There was what looked like a bullet hole- with blood still seeping from it.

"Doesn't that hurt?" Alex pointed, aghast.

The blonde woman looked down as if she had forgotten that it was there. "Oh. No, not anymore."

"Oh," Alex said, not knowing what to say.

"I have to go," the woman said suddenly, looking around.

"Why?" Alex asked.

"Sayid," she replied distractedly. "He's going that way."

"Sayid," Alex repeated, "the man with… with…"

"Your mother," the woman said, getting up.

"Wait!" Alex called as she started to walk. The tall blonde turned. "What's your name?"

The woman didn't reply for a moment, as if she had to think about her answer.

"Shannon." She said finally- and then she was gone, as though she had vanished into thin air.

----------------

After Kate finished showering, she had found Jack playing caregiver again and making some DI mac n' cheese on their small cooking range. The food was delicious after two weeks of nothing but fruit and the occasional fish, but nobody said a word during the entire meal. Kate ate a few bites voraciously and then put down her fork, feeling sick. Jack stared at his plate for the entire time; seemingly oblivious to the bashful sidelong glances Sawyer and Kate were giving each other.

Kate was smiling back rather half-heartedly, debating with herself about when she should tell Jack and Sawyer what Henry said to her. She hoped they would listen, though she could see Jack brushing it off as a scare tactic and going back to ignoring her, and Sawyer going all over-protective and doing something stupid. Better to keep it to herself for now, she reflected.

Sawyer, as per usual these days, seemed to be the only one acting normally, and he knew it. He was the only one that the Others hadn't significantly hurt or done anything to. Jack was being a jealous prat, which probably had something to do with the fact that they had turned him into some sort of messed up Superman. Too much testosterone, or something, but his gigantic ego definitely played a part as well. And he wasn't even sure what they had done to Kate, but it worried him a great deal. How long were they going to be stuck here? Sawyer had seriously underestimated these people.

"I'm going to bed," Kate announced, rubbing her eyes. "I'll take the couch, I guess," she glanced over to it, remembering that there were only two small cots in the bedroom.

"No," Jack said, not wanting to sleep in a room alone with either Kate or Sawyer. "I'm sleeping on the couch," he said getting up and claiming it before Kate could. "And that's final," he said in a tone that left no room for argument.

"Jack, it's ok. You barely fit-"

"If you want to sleep here, Kate, you're going to have to forcibly remove me," he said contemptuously.

"Fine," Kate snapped, giving Jack a very significant look and storming into the bedroom.

"What the hell is wrong with you, man?" Sawyer growled, throwing the dinner plates haphazardly into the sink.

"I'm having a bad day."

"Yeah, we all are!" Sawyer shot back. "The hell did Kate do to you?"

"Nothing." Jack snapped. "I just- I feel-" he faltered slightly.

"You feel like a jealous bastard?" Sawyer supplied exasperatedly, always being one to voice exactly what he thought.

Jack's eyes flashed dangerously. "This has nothing to do with Kate." He said, voice an octave lower than usual.

"Doesn't it?" Sawyer asked angrily.

"Of course it does!" Jack exploded, stopping dead and breathing hard. "I- I-" he stammered, ashamed at his outburst.

"Fuck you Sawyer!" Jack said loudly, snapping his mouth shut as Kate emerged from the bedroom, looking extremely alarmed and white faced. "Stop it," she uttered, on the verge of tears. "Just _stop it._" Then she rushed back into the bedroom and slammed the door.

Jack lied down on the couch and turned away from Sawyer, bent on ignoring him for the rest of eternity. Sawyer took another look at Jack, scowled and quietly pushed the bedroom door open, expecting Kate to be angry with him, but she was just sitting on her bed, white as a sheet, staring at him intently.

"Freckles..." he murmured, sitting down beside her. Sawyer was slightly alarmed; she looked like she was dead.

"Sawyer," she said seriously, "Henry told me that we only have two or three weeks together."

"What?" Sawyer asked, body freezing up.

"That's what he said. I don't know if he was serious..." she seemed to reconsider, not wanting to lie. "I _know _he was serious."

"Before what?" Sawyer whispered, intense dread seeping through his body for the second time that day.

"I don't know..." Kate had frozen up, like he had just moments earlier.

"It gonna be ok…" he said, pressing his lips to her cheek, trying to warm up her icy skin. She relaxed the tiniest bit, so he pressed another one to her neck and nuzzled into her, savoring the scent of soap that still lingered on her.

"Sawyer…" she sighed, feeling her defenses drop even though she could see with absolute certainty where this was headed. She exhaled sharply as he nipped at her earlobe, tongue dancing lightly across her face.

Sawyer wasn't sure exactly how far Kate was going to let him go, but an unexplainable sense of urgency had settled on them. They thought they had all the time in the world on this island, but now it seemed there wasn't enough, and it was suffocating. Kate, however, didn't seem to be minding his advances. She bit her bottom lip again, smiled, and then turned into his kisses and catching his lips. They kissed hungrily, Kate's hands threaded into Sawyer's hair, Sawyer's hands around the small of her back, pulling her close.

Kate shifted so that she was straddling Sawyer's lap and let her hands drag down his neck to unbutton the Dharma shirt he had found after his shower.

Sawyer noted her forwardness and pulled away reluctantly. "Katie," he said, voice husky, "Are you sure about this?" He knew he was being taken advantage of somewhat, and he certainly didn't mind, but he didn't want it the other way around.

Kate smiled a little. _This_ from the man who had been trying to get down her pants for the last two months.

"Sawyer," she said, dead serious, "I love you."

Sawyer didn't say anything for a moment. "Katie- I- I-" he stammered, unsure of how to express that he felt the same way. Kate seemed to understand. "Shhh," she placed a finger to his lips, "I know." She mouthed, and then replaced her finger with her lips, letting him press her down into the thin mattress, abandoning herself to pure sensation.

----------------

"Henry," Alex said, trying to act as nonchalant as possible, "tell me about my mother again."

"Again?" Henry frowned and looked at her sternly over his reading glasses. He was leafing through some boring reports while Alex peeled fruit for a fruit salad.

"I like to hear it," she said, trying to sound agreeable. She had woken up in her tent that morning with a strange memory of speaking to a tall, beautiful blonde woman at the edge of camp. Had it been a dream? A delusion? Or was had that woman… Shannon… actually been there? She had read reports of Dharma scientists, remote viewers, and psychics seeing things on the island that couldn't possible be there. Was it simply a side effect of the strange radiation on the island, or did the radiation itself cause things... the paranormal, physical manifestations of thoughts... did the strange circumstances here cause these things to happen?

Henry sighed. "You know. She couldn't conceive, but desperately wanted a child. So she conceived by invitro, right here on the island and died a week later because of complications from the birth.

Alex almost had to stop herself from scoffing. It all sounded so cold, so clinical. "And her name?" Alex prompted, as she always did at the end of the story.

"You know it Alex, it was Andrea."

Alex nodded, pretending to be placated. She put the bowl of fruit she had chopped in front of Henry. "I'm going for a walk," she announced.

Henry looked up. "Make sure you stay on camp grounds," he warned, as he always did.

Alex rolled her eyes, "Yes, Henry."

As soon as she had left, Henry Gale picked up the phone to his left and dialed. "Hello? Yes, this is Dr. Gale. I have a new assignment for you. Please keep Alex under tabs for a while- yes, discreetly- of course. You will report directly to me. Yes. Thank you." Henry put down the phone and sighed again. He knew Alex too well for anything to get past him. He knew it was a distinct possibility that she would catch on one day, but he had certainly hoped it wouldn't be so soon. _Ah, well, _he reflected, _she has been quite useful. Pity she's digging her own grave, and her mother's._

----------------

Jack pushed his head farther into the couch pillows, trying to ignore the rather obvious sounds coming from the next room. God- he wasn't sure how to feel. Sad? Disappointed? Angry? Disgusted? He felt all of them. And where on earth to start? How about their blatant lack of consideration for him? They could at least keep it down; what he didn't know couldn't hurt him. But to have them going at it like animals in such a terrible situation made him want to throw up.

But underneath his boiling rage there was something else, something far more vulnerable that had been hurt terribly. And it wasn't that Sawyer had... _ had _her first, in a physical sense, but that she chose him and not Jack. God... he thought he was so above all this nonsense after being married and divorced already... but he couldn't help feeling that Kate should be with _him. _There it was again, that completely irrational, petulant feeling that was so unlike Jack. He sighed into the couch pillows, not caring that he couldn't breathe. He would rather die of asphyxiation than have to listen to Kate and Sawyer having sex.

He knew part of this had to do with whatever they had done to him- pumped him full of steroids, testosterone, stimulants- whatever. He didn't want to worry anybody, but he felt _dangerous._ Like, if one those bastards out there came in here he would wring their scrawny little necks and feel no guilt afterwards. Just the thought of it got Jack excited, though inwardly he was terribly alarmed. They had turned him into some sort of horrible monster.

Jack thought about these same things, in big circles for what seemed like ages, until they came out completely different. Kate had been in an extremely vulnerable state... what if Sawyer had taken advantage of her? It would be just like him to do something like that. Jack growled and hit the side of the couch angrily as various moans and shouts assailed his ears. He needed a drink. A strong one, preferably. Plugging his ears, Jack got up and perused the pantry. Sure enough, hidden behind several cans of peas, was a bottle of vodka. Jack grabbed at it and sat down, doing his best to ignore everything.

--------------

Kate sighed peacefully in her post-coital bliss. She could see Sawyer wearing a similar expression to hers in the dim lamplight.

"So Freckles," he said sleepily, "if you'd known it was gonna be _that _good, you woulda jumped my bones a lot earlier, eh?"

She smacked him lightly and blushed. Sawyer certainly was a considerate lover- and besides the great sex, it had been so amazing- a light in the dark tunnel- not one at the end, but one to carry nonetheless. "You could have kept it down," she murmured into his chest.

He chuckled. "_I _was the one being loud?"

Kate paled suddenly. "God- Sawyer- what if Jack heard us?"

Sawyer scowled instantly at the mention of Jack. "Jack's probably sleeping like a fuckin' rock, darling."

"I hope so," she replied.

"Katie?"

"Yeah, Sawyer?"

"I gotta pee."

Kate laughed, remembering her previous plight in the cell. It was easy for a guy to just whip it out and go, but being a woman, she had a little bit more of a challenge. She rolled off Sawyer's chest so he could put his pants back on.

Sawyer pushed the door open quietly, intent on tiptoeing past Jack. But Jack wasn't sleeping. He was leaning against the back of the couch with a strained expression on his face. "Uh, hey Doc," Sawyer said awkwardly, trying to slink past.

Kate poked her head out of the room- "Sawyer, can you get me-" just in time to see Jack punch Sawyer hard across the face. "Sawyer!" she yelled, rushing forwards.

"Son of a bitch!" Sawyer roared, spitting blood onto the ground and moving to retaliate, but Kate pushed him back. "Sawyer- don't," she said softly, and he scowled disappointedly. It didn't matter. Kate turned around and slapped Jack across the face, hard, like any self-respecting woman could do. His eyes widened in disbelief and then he reeled backwards.

"What the _fuck _is wrong with you?" Kate yelled, rounding on Jack.

"Oh, sorry!" he said vindictively. "I'll just sit back the next time Sawyer _seduces _and _takes advantage _of you!"

"How dare you," Kate breathed quietly, one hand still holding Sawyer back as he growled.

Sawyer stopped trying to get to Jack for a moment and regarded him closely. "Are you _drunk, _Jackass?" Sawyer knew inebriation when he saw it.

"Maybe," Jack snarled wildly. "Doesn't change anything, _Katie," _he said, making fun of Sawyer's affectionate nickname for her. "You'll always be Sawyer's _whore."_

Kate closed her eyes sadly, hardly daring to believe that Jack had just said that. Sawyer gave out another roar and lunged again, but Kate put herself in the way. "It's not worth it," she said in a sad whisper. "I'm finished with him. I'm finished with you, Jack!" she called, voice cracking as fresh tears came to her.

"Fine," he said tonelessly. "Fine." without another word, he lay back down on his couch, buried his head in the pillows once more and blocked out the world, to drunk to care that he had just fucked everything up.

Kate just stood there and stared at Jack in shock. "Kate," Sawyer said gently. "Go back to bed. I'll be right there."

"No," she whispered, trying to compose herself, "let me help you get fixed up." Together they went into the bathroom and Kate dabbed at Sawyer's bloodied lip with a wet towel.

"There," she said, when she had finished.

"Thanks," he whispered back miserably. They slunk back to bed and huddled close, feeling too much despair to consider the implications of what Jack had said. Kate cried, feeling worse than she had earlier, and Sawyer held her, a few tears of his own mixing with hers.

----------------

**AN: hoooshit. More angst! I hope that was long enough this time. I went a little overboard. And Shannon…eeh! I love Shannon, but never fear, those of you going "omg, Shannon died. How cheesy is this!" Shannon is still, unfortunately, quite dead, and is going to stay that way.**

**Please, please, please review. You have no idea how much it means to me. Just press the little button.**

**Pressssit!**


	9. IX

**Chapter 9**

**AN: Ok. Here's my little disclaimer before season three starts. From the clips I've seen, my view of the Others and their facilities are slightly more decadent than canon would have it. Let's call it artistic license. They wouldn't be doing what they did to Kate unless they had the means to take care of her… **

**  
With regards to what they did to Kate, well, I threw you a bone this chapter, well, _the _bone. You're gonna find out as an apology for this piece of crap excuse for a chapter. It's just a jumble of transitional material while I set up for ze next major plot point. **

Kate woke up first the next morning. She extricated her limbs from Sawyer's, trying hard to not to wake him. Last night, after attempting to sleep on the one tiny mattress, they had gotten up and pushed the two beds together, giving them a little more room.

Sawyer mumbled something unintelligible in his sleep, rolled over, but didn't wake up. Kate tiptoed past Jack and scowled at him distastefully. She didn't know what to think, or how to feel, other than dead. Just dead, like a plant that was shriveled and grey. The things he had said had just been so terrible- things she would never have imagined him saying in a thousand years. _Guess that proves alcohol shows your true colors, then. _

Her streak of resiliency and her pride were definitely flared- she was angry, but beneath it was pain, sharp like a knife, cutting her insides as she breathed. Pain because she cared about Jack more than she'd like to admit; maybe the same was she liked Sawyer. This confused her a great deal. Last night, she had told Sawyer that she loved him, and it was true. She just couldn't deny it any more. But Jack- to like him that way, to _love _him, was opening an entire can of worms that she desperately needed to stay closed. For all their sakes.

Jack was sleeping the dead sleep of the extremely hung over, head lolling off the couch and mouth open. He was going to have a nasty headache when he woke up.

Kate flicked on the lights in the washroom and splashed some water on her face even though she had showered naught but maybe sixteen hours ago- extremely clean by island standards. She felt _dirty._ Like Jack's words about her being Sawyer's whore had sullied her somehow, and she couldn't ever be clean. Tears welled up in her eyes and she splashed more water on her face to wash them away.

Taking a deep breath, Kate toweled off her face and padded quietly back to the bedroom, where she found Sawyer semi-awake, still heavy lidded and looking disgruntled. "Come back to bed, Sassafras," he mumbled, half his face buried in the pillow.

Kate smiled but shook her head. "I'm a morning person."

"Just come back here," he said sleepily, wanting his will done, but not having the energy to pull it off- so he resorted to desperate measures. "_Please,_" he said, not a hint of mocking or sarcasm in his voice. He meant it. He wanted to have her close by.

She raised an eyebrow, slightly surprised. "Well… ok. But just for a bit." She slipped back into bed and sighed contentedly as Sawyer wrapped his arms around her again.

"That's better…" he murmured into her hair, inhaling her scent. "Honestly," he said, voice muffled, "there ain't nothin' to do around here. Why d'you hafta be up so early?"

Kate shrugged. It was true that she had to be doing something all the time… she grew restless so easily. "I guess I could relax a bit longer…" she stretched luxuriously and kissed the corner of his mouth softly, so as not to touch the side that was hurt.

"Thanks for your concern," he said, "but I'm ok," he kissed her properly, and she sighed contentedly, wondering how she could feel so loved and so awful at the same time. Sawyer took a moment to appreciate the woman in his arms as she drifted off to sleep- feeling like the luckiest son of a bitch on earth. _How ironic, _he mused, pressing another kiss to her jaw, and then joining her in slumber.

-----------------

Rolling waves of nausea woke Jack from his sleep. He tried to lie as still as possible for a moment, hoping it would pass. He felt awful. Normally he didn't suffer too badly from hangovers- but the fact that the Others had altered his body chemistry and that he had downed an entire bottle of bad vodka- well, that just made everything _great. _It felt like someone was lighting fireworks inside his skull, and the sound of his arm brushing the side of the couch was just so damn _loud. _

The nausea didn't pass. He sprinted off the couch and into the bathroom, feeling lucky that the distance was so short. Jack emptied the contents of his stomach violently into the toilet bowl, coughing and spluttering. He flushed the toilet and buried his face in his hands, groaning loudly. Unfortunately, one symptom of heavy drinking seemed to elude him- the gap in memory during said period of time. No, he remembered with perfect clarity everything he had said to everyone and how he had hit Sawyer.

What the hell was happening to him? Tears welled up in his eyes. He was turning into a monster, and he couldn't stop it. The amount of utter shit that had passed his lips last night was astounding. And God- he had called Kate a whore. Sawyer's whore. Was that how he really felt about her?

He had to fight it, he resolved. Had to fight the monster they had made him into and more than that, he had to fight the green-eyed monster that had always lived inside of him, and make things right again. They had to be. Even if he never had a chance with Kate, he couldn't let her hate him forever. They had to be united to stay alive, to stay sane.

Jack quickly rinsed his mouth out, wincing at the sound of the water crashing into the metal basin of the sink. He had to take things one small step at a time to repair his relationship with Kate- and step number one was finding some coffee to cure his terrible hangover.

As he walked back into the kitchen, he noted that the bedroom door was wide open. (Kate had forgotten to close it the first time she woke up that morning.) He glanced into the room in passing, and his heart thudded sadly again. Kate and Sawyer were sleeping in each other's arms, the perfect picture of love and happiness. A picture that Jack would never have a place in. Even Sawyer- a man who was so full of shit all the time, could have a relationship with someone. And for some reason, Jack just couldn't. Maybe he was dysfunctional. Perhaps being a doctor, having to be morally superior all the time had messed with his brain, because he couldn't seem to be close to anyone without fucking it up.

-----------------

"We are going to have to put together a rescue team, John," Sayid said abruptly. They were sitting on the beach eating breakfast, since the hatch had been mostly destroyed two weeks ago.

Locke looked up from the trashy paperback romance novel he was reading, and nodded slowly after a moment. "You're right. I think we've all given up on the hope that the Others are just gonna let them go. But we don't have a lot of people here, Sayid, and we certainly don't have enough to divvy up between a rescue operation that's near impossible, and protecting everyone here."

"Are you saying we should just leave them there?" Sayid asked frustratedly.

"No, I'm saying we need to consider our priorities." Locke gave him a hard look.

"Fine," Sayid said, temper rising, "but I think you should let people chose for themselves whether they wish to help me or not."

Locke shrugged non-commitally. "That's up to them."

"I will help you," Eko called out, walking up the beach. "Many people I have come to know on this island have been taken by those people."

Sayid nodded appreciatively.

"You must have ears like a fox," Locke said.

"Yes," Eko smiled, "like a fox."

-----------------

Kate awoke abruptly as the warm, solid object under her head suddenly slipped away. "Hey!" she grumbled rather unenthusiastically.

"Hey yourself, Ms. Mornin' Person," Sawyer smirked, pulling a shirt on. "Have a nice nap?"

Kate rolled onto her back, feeling extremely lethargic. She sniffed once, noting a familiar aroma in the air. "Is that... coffee I smell?"

Sawyer scowled darkly. "Yeah, I'll bet the ol' doc's got a killer hangover. I can go get some for you, if you want." Sawyer watched sadly as Kate's previous, contented mood slipped away. She curled up and pulled the sheet up around her neck.

"No... that's ok. I don't really feel like having anything right now." She smiled weekly to reassure him, but he wasn't reassured.

"Well- I'm gonna go get some chow. You'll be ok for a minute?"

She rolled her eyes. "Yes, dad."

Sawyer frowned. "No callin' me dad after you've done the dirty with me."

That elicited a small laugh from her. "Sorry."

"Be right back," he said again, and slipped out.

Jack didn't look up as Sawyer emerged. He was sitting at the kitchen table, a steaming cup of instant Dharma coffee under his nose, and looking straight ahead, unblinking. Sawyer didn't say anything to him. He rummaged in their little pantry until he found some canned peaches and then went to the cabinets to find a bowl. The first one revealed only a stack of books. Sawyer scanned the titles, semi-interestedly and grabbed a handful before resuming his quest for a bowl.

"There's some hot water left if Kate wants some coffee." Jack said, sounding as if he didn't really care whether she did or not.

"She doesn't," Sawyer said shortly, grabbed two forks and made straight for the bedroom again.

"Tell Kate I'm sorry," Jack said, just before Sawyer went in.

Sawyer turned, wearing a very cold expression. "I don' think that means shit at the moment."

"Your right," Jack snapped, "it doesn't." The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them, as if the filter that kept shit like that from passing his lips had been removed.

"I didn't think so," Sawyer said, went into the bedroom and slammed the door.

-----------------

Sawyer found Kate exactly where he had left her, curled up on her side staring blankly at the wall.

"I found some peaches, Freckles," he said, waving them under her nose enticingly.

She wrinkled her nose and shrunk away from them.

"You gotta take care of yourself," he pressed on, spearing one and eating it, making obvious "yum yum" sounds.

"What are you gonna do next," she said tonelessly, "try the airplane thing?"

Sawyer scowled, going for a different approach. He shoved a slice of peach in her face, succeeding only in getting juice and little bits of peach on her lips.

"Sawye-!" she said, unable to finish because he had pressed his lips to hers, licking up the sweet juice, trying to entice a response from her. She just scowled and turned her head, breaking the connection between them. Sawyer sat back, feeling disappointed and slightly hurt.

"Kate, you gotta eat," he said. "Food ain' negotiable."

She sighed. "If I have some, will you shut up about it?"

"Yes," he said, pushing it towards her again. She took it and put some in her mouth, making a face as she chewed it.

"I found some books," Sawyer reached down to the ground and picked up the handful of dog-eared paperbacks he had brought. There were a few classics and a couple of books that looked like they had been pretty new stuff back in the eighties. "I don' got my glasses, but I could read to you for a bit.

Kate glanced over without interest.

"We got ourselves Hamlet, Lolita, Little Women-"

"Little Women," Kate smiled, suddenly engaged. "I used to read that over and over again when I was a teenager."

"Well, then you don't need to read it again, do ya," Sawyer scowled, knowing she had made up her mind.

"You said you'd read to me Sawyer," she said rather persuasively, shuffling closer to him and setting herself up for a comfortable reading session.

Sawyer sighed and rolled his eyes. "Alright, alright… Here we go."

Kate smiled a little, some measure of comfort added to her day.

"'_Christmas won't be Christmas without any presents," grumbled Jo, lying on the rug…'"_

----------------

Alex padded gently through the jungle, swinging her rucksack back and forth, in a rather dark humor. Henry had set her the rather menial task of picking fruit while he got to analyze blood samples and samples of DNA. Alex humphed. It was always one step forward, two steps back with Henry. Every time he let her do something more complicated, he'd have a change of faith and set her back to doing something stupid. Not that she would have been able to focus properly in the lab anyways. There were still too many things to think about.

Spotting a tree with a few guavas to pick, she flexed her long limbs and scaled it like it was nobody's business. She supposed it was a perk of growing up in the middle of nowhere. Chucking the fruit into her bag, she made to slide town the trunk and back to the grounds.

"Alex…" someone said softly. Alex froze, scanning the ground for the source of the voice.

"Behind you." Said the cool voice. Alex gulped and turned very slowly, wondering how someone could have been in the tree without her noticing.

It was Shannon, sitting on the tree branch opposite, stomach still seeping blood. Alex opened her mouth to say something, but Shannon brought her finger to her lips so violently it was a wonder she didn't fall out of the tree. "Someone's following you," Shannon said, as if she didn't really care that much. "One of your people. I came to warn you- stay away from your mother, stay away from _Sayid." _ She said, sounding almost angry. "You'll lead him straight to them and then he'll kill them both."

Alex opened her mouth again, but Shannon was already gone. She took a few deep breaths, trying to steady her shaking body and then let herself down the tree, looking around discretely. Had Henry set someone to follow her? How on Earth could he know that she had seen her mother- Danielle? Then again, she knew that there were eyes and ears on every square inch of the island. How stupid of her. If Henry or Ethan had found out that she had helped Claire escape... well, punishments on the island constituted much worse than a time out or being grounded. More like not eating for a week.

But Alex was having second thoughts... it had seemed so inhumane to try and take someone's child away from them, demonstrated by Claire and Danielle...

Alex had some serious thinking to do about where her allegiance lay. There was no longer a "greater good"; the Dharma Initiative didn't even officially exist anymore. It was just a big science experiment gone wrong, Henry trying desperately to pick up the pieces no matter what the human casualties amounted to.

It didn't seem fair to Kate at all- she was by no means innocent, and that's why they chose her. Because she was the worst of them, of all the survivors. Because her track record stated that she was a_ bad _ person, a murderer.

And in nine months she was going to pay for her own crimes and Dharma's failures with her own child.


	10. X

**Chapter 10**

AN: Nice looooooong one for you guys here. Funny, I got sort of stuck halfway through this, so I basically tied myself down and forced the writing out, and it just flowed. It's like using Drain-O. Or a laxative. Haha. Sorry for the mental image there.

----------------

The next few days in Other-Hell went much the same as before. Jack kept to himself, having no desire to speak to anybody. Instead, he devoted his efforts to trying to find a way out- efforts that had thus far been in vain. Kate had started more than once upon hearing Jack take a swing at the door with his fists and giving a loud, hoarse cry of anguish. Alex came by once, tight lipped and looking anxious, to take some of Kate's blood and then spirited away again.

Kate had floated around, feeling like a piece of tumbleweed; dead, dusty, and tumbling around as the wind would have it. She had retreated into a shell, some part of her realizing the utter hopelessness of their situation and letting the fighter in her take a backseat to it. She and Sawyer hadn't had sex since that first time- and it wasn't that she didn't want to, or want him, but she didn't feel up to anything, and for once, he didn't bother her about it.

No, Sawyer just sat back and watched helplessly as the two of them fell apart, slowly pulling his sanity down the drain with them. How long would it be before they found the old razorblades in the bathroom and did something very, very stupid. Sawyer blanched immediately at these thoughts, shaking his head and trying not to think about things like that. And yet, part of him wondered if he should hide the razors somewhere else… trouble was, he wasn't sure if that was because he didn't want Jack or Kate to get to them, or whether he wanted them all for himself.

----------------

"Claire," a deep male voice said.

Claire turned around, holding Aaron. "Oh, hello," she smiled good-naturedly. "What can I do for you, Mr. Eko?" Claire said, pulling the little blue slipper she had knit Aaron from his mouth as he gurgled contentedly.

"I heard that you and the French woman found another hatch, when you thought that Aaron was sick. I would like you to tell me how to get there," he said, sounding direct, yet slow, deliberate and kind at the same time.

"Oh." Claire nodded, realizing this was about the three castaways who were currently missing in action. "Yes, of course I'll tell you. Why do you want to go there?"

"I wish to investigate it. It may help us learn more about those people, so that we can rescue your friends."

Claire felt badly for Kate and Jack- Kate had helped her so much with the baby and having Jack around had done wonders for her sanity as she became more comfortable with being a mum and learning not to worry so much when the baby got sick. "If there's anything else I can do, Mr. Eko, you'll let me know?"

Eko nodded once. "Telling me where the medical hatch is will be more than enough. I only wish that you and your baby stay safe."

Claire smiled weakly, looking down at Aaron again. "We will," she said, sounding more sure than she felt.

----------------

Pickett gulped, pulling his report from the old typewriter and setting it neatly inside a folder. Henry was _not _going to be happy.

He had just finished his weekly review of the surveillance camera footage, though it was certainly not promising, the footage had been quite interesting; an emotional reunion, a drunken argument, followed by days of mostly nothing. And not to mention the extremely steamy sex scene that had ensued shortly after the captives' arrival in their new quarters.

That was certainly going to get him in a lot of hot water.

Pickett was the head of the extremely small and limited psychology team here on the island. He had been the one to suggest the three of them stay together, for a while anyways, as Kate discovered her pregnancy. To give her memory suppressants too early in the pregnancy could result in a miscarriage- and that was the absolute last thing they needed. But now, there was the very excellent possibility that their first experiment hadn't worked properly, and the baby was Sawyer's- for the insemination and the, well, sex, had happened very close to each other, and their was no guarantee that the former had worked. Alex had taken blood from Kate and confirmed that she was indeed pregnant, and by the tenth week or so they would be able to do a prenatal paternity test. If it wasn't Jack's- well, then, the nicest way of saying it would be "trying again."

Pickett stood, sheaf of papers in hand and made his way to Henry's office. He was in _so _ much shit if it wasn't the doctor's kid.

-----------------

"Y'all good with some Dharma sloppy joes for dinner?" Sawyer mused, inspecting a can of what (hopefully) contained meat.

"Kate's a vegetarian," Jack said, eyebrows raised.

Sawyer scowled. "She wasn't a vegetarian the other day when she was eatin' that spam sandwich."

Kate rolled her eyes. "It's fine. I don't think Dharma caters to vegetarians."

"Ah, I see," Sawyer said, smiling, "you're one of those vegetarians who breaks down every so often and eats a double cheeseburger."

Kate laughed and nodded guiltily. "You got me all figured out, Sawyer."

Sawyer felt his chest swell just a little with pride. Kate had been so down and out for the last few days; it felt good to make her smile. "Well, it ain' exactly Chef Boyardee, but one sloppy joe coming right up. And yeah, one for you too Jackass, 'cause I'm in a good mood."

"Thanks, Sawyer," Jack said sarcastically.

Using the ever-useful can opener, Sawyer opened up the joes and set the can on the heating range. Noting Kate's dubious look, he said, "Well, you see a microwave anywhere Freckles?"

Kate held up her hands in defense. "Carry on. You _are _the master chef of course."

Sawyer considered his new title for a moment, and then shrugged. "Master chef's gotta take a whiz," Sawyer said, sprinting off towards the bathroom.

Kate and Jack sat in silence for a moment, wrinkling their noses as the scent of preservatives began to waft across the room.

"Kate," Jack said suddenly, "I know you probably don't care, but I- I- I'm sorry about the things I said. Sawyer's right. I'm an asshole."

Kate didn't say anything for a moment, but then all of a sudden cracked a smile. "Yeah," she said, smiling wider, "yeah, you are, Jack."

Jack nodded, smiling weakly, wondering if Kate was about to have a mental breakdown or something.

"Jack. I don't care. I just-" she paused to rub her eyes, the words having trouble making it from her brain to her mouth. "I don't care. I can't hate you. It's too much of a drain. I want to hate you, but I can't. Let's just… worry about staying alive and getting out of here, ok? I can't deal with anymore emotional bullshit."

"Ok. That's- that's good. And I promise I won't drink the whole bottle of vodka without sharing next time."

Kate smiled. "You better not, Jack Shephard."

At that moment, Sawyer sauntered out of the bathroom, stopping and surveying the scene before him suspiciously. He raised one eyebrow. "You two gotten at the vodka again?"

"It's alright, Sawyer," Kate said, getting up and giving Sawyer a chaste kiss, "Jack and I are good now."

Sawyer scowled and rounded on Jack, his light mood suddenly gone. "If you say another goddamned nasty thing to-"

"Sawyer," Kate said gently, locking gaze with him.

"What?" he said, sounding disgruntled.

"Your sloppy joes are burning."

Kate couldn't help but crack a smile as Sawyer let out a "Son of a bitch!" and ran for the stove.

Dinner was a much happier affair than it had been for the last few days. Jack and Kate talked and laughed freely, though they were both making an effort not to talk about anything too serious. Sawyer didn't say much, just ate and scowled as Kate sent the occasional annoyed glance at him for being the dark cloud over the dinner table.

Sawyer didn't care. He knew he was being as unreasonable as the doc had been… and Sawyer was not prone to feeling any emotions strongly, other than love, hate, and jealousy. There was no grey area in between- just those categories and complete and utter lack of caring. Kate, well, that was love, as strange as it was to admit. He never thought he'd care about anyone that way after losing Cassidy- but here they were. And for the moment, thoughts of Jack came with a subtle, burning rage. All the had done was make up, for God's sake, but it bothered him, because, yeah, he'd never admit it to anyone but he was extremely jealous of Jack. 'Cause Jack was a good guy, and the good guys always save the day and get the girl. It was sloppy seconds for Sawyer.

Just then the door burst open. An armed guard crossed the room in three long strides and grabbed Sawyer. Not in the mood for witty repartee, Pickett put his handgun to Sawyer's head and dragged him backwards out of the room. Sawyer saw Kate turn white as a sheet and scream, going for him until Jack caught her by the wrist.

-----------------

_Earlier_

"I told you we should have separated them!" Henry yelled angrily, slamming his fist on the shaky metal table.

Pickett cowered. "We have to keep her happy, Henry, or she might try and do something to lose the baby!"

"You had better goddamn hope that that baby is Shephard's," Henry said, voice deadly quiet, "or you _will _be punished."

"But sir," Pickett said desperately, "I didn't know that they would-"

"It's what people do, Pickett," Henry said icily. "You can't just stick two men and woman in a tiny room for an extended period and except them to keep their hands to themselves!"

Pickett seethed. It was _not _his fault that stupid hick couldn't keep it in his pants.

"This _is _your fault, Pickett," Henry said, rather eerily, "and time is going to be your judge. Now leave."

Pickett stormed out of the room, resisting the urge to throw his fist into the wall. Someone needed to pay for that reprimand, and well, it _was _Sawyer's fault. Picket figured that as the head of psychology on the island, he could have his psychological and parapsychological experiments… accelerated.

"Get Ford," he snapped moodily to the armed guard standing outside their door. The man turned and fumbled with the complicated lock for a while. Pickett exhaled sharply and butted in, pulling the guard's gun from his hands and opening the door for himself.

---------------

Sawyer cursed fluently as Pickett threw him roughly into a small, cramped room with terrible lighting and at least three armed men. Pickett then came in after him and slammed the door, his frustration and annoyance fairly evident.

"What the hell is your problem?" Sawyer snapped frustratedly as his hands were tied behind his back and to the chair.

"_You _are, you stupid bastard." Pickett said, violently ripping old sheets off his clipboard and gritting his teeth.

"Well gee," Sawyer said sarcastically, "I don' remember putting itching powder in _your _underpants,"

"No," Pickett snarled back, "but you had to go and sleep with my experiment!"

"_Excuse _me?" Sawyer said, obviously flabbergasted. "You mean Kate?"

"You fuck anyone else lately?" Pickett shot back.

Sawyer growled and pulled hard against his bonds. Something about the way he had said that annoyed Sawyer greatly- _fucking _was _not _the word to describe what was going on between them, stupid bastard. But then it occurred to him. How on earth did this guy know that? "Have you been spyin' on us, you son of a bitch? 'Cause that ain't none of your goddamn business!"

Pickett rolled his eyes. "Why would we keep you if we weren't interested in what we you were doing? And just _who _you happened to be doing just about-"

"Got you fired?" Sawyer asked, voice verging on being delighted.

"To make it short," Pickett conceded. "Anyways," he said, lips curling into a thin smile, "today's test involves using your psychic abilities under mental duress-"

"Sorry pal, I don' got anymore mental duress than usual. You kinda just make me wanna _giggle."_

"What if I told you that your worst enemy knocked up your girlfriend?" Pickett took pleasure in watching Sawyer pale considerably.

"What?" he uttered, hardly daring to believe.

"Don't worry," Pickett said, "we couldn't just force them to have sex- though it is a good idea..." he mused. "But that was our experiment, you see, impregnating that worthless bitch with the doctor's child-"

Sawyer roared and pulled at his bonds so violently that he only succeeded in scraping the skin off his wrists.

"Unfortunately," Pickett said still more loudly over the racket Sawyer was making, "you had to go and screw 'er before we knew our experiment was a success- so you better hope that kid, and yeah, there is a kid, isn't yours, _James," _Pickett said mockingly, "because that is just gonna piss me off even more."

-----------------

Dusk had fallen at camp. The only illumination was the moonlight and the warm orange glow that radiated from the twenty or so campfires spread along the shore. Eko was sitting outside his makeshift shelter, reading the names of people whom he had asked to help him rescue Jack, Kate, and Sawyer from the clutches of the Others.

Eko looked up, hearing the water and sand squelch softly as Sayid walked along the shoreline towards him. "How is your search coming along?"

"Very well," Eko said, passing the list to Sayid, "but I do not think we should take more than half a dozen people."

Sayid nodded. "Agreed. But we need to see if we can get Alex to help us before setting out. It will be much easier with that information and a woman on the inside."

"Yes. She must be very confused. It is not every day that a girl meets her mother after sixteen years."

"It is odd," Sayid mused, "that the life of death of three people hangs on a teenage girl we hardly know."

"The Lord works in many ways," Eko said, profound and wise ever.

"Yes." Sayid murmered, suddenly thinking about Shannon. He hadn't in a while... it just stirred up too many emotions that he didn't have the will to control. He had to function. He had to be useful, he had to save his friends from the people that took her from him.

"You will see her in another life," Eko said, sensing his thoughts.

"What?" Sayid said sharply, looking up.

"Something a wise person once told me," he said by way of explanation.

"Yes, me too," Sayid said, letting himself get lost in memories.

----------------

"Jack?" Kate asked anxiously, wringing her hands,

"Hmmm?" Jack replied looking up from the book he was leafing through.

"I need to ask you something, um, medical."

"Shoot," Jack said, closing his book and looking at her attentively, wondering what this was about.

"I'm um… late…" Kate said, blushing slightly.

Jack let out a long breath. Thank god it hadn't been something more serious. _Though, this could be very, very serious,_ some voice in his head said. "Uh, it could be a lot of things Kate… the severe stress, change to your eating habits, that sort of things," Jack said, not willing to admit the third possibility.

"Yeah… but…" Kate bit her lip anxiously, "I've always been really, uh, regular."

"Like I said… it could be anything. Maybe whatever _they _did to you is affecting your cycle."

"Jack," Kate said sharply, her worry and anxiety obvious, "could I be pregnant?" She said each word slowly and clearly, getting Jack in the proverbial corner.

Jack didn't say anything for a long time, "Yeah," he said finally, "Yeah, you could be."

Kate didn't move or say anything. She just nodded slowly and stared straight ahead as if she was trying not to be sick.

Just then the door swung open and Sawyer stumbled in, looking like someone had dropped an anvil on him. Kate's personal worry was forgotten for a moment as she sprang up to meet him.

"Sawyer?" she said, taking his hands and pulling him quickly onto the couch, "are you ok?"

Jack got up to get him a glass of water.

"Yeah," Sawyer managed to smile weakly. "Yeah, I'm fine. Guy just said a bunch of shit to me. Tough session." It had been. Not only had Pickett jeered and taunted him about Kate, but he had forced him to do those damn psychic tests at the same time… and he had a feeling that he had scored extraordinarily well.

Sawyer accepted the glass of water from Jack with a rare grateful nod and downed it one gulp.

"You wanna talk about it?" Kate asked softly as Jack retreated from the scene.

Sawyer's expression didn't change at all. "No."

"It's late," Kate said soothingly, trying to betray less worry than she felt. "You should go sleep." Sawyer was tough; he had a thick skin. Whatever they had said to him had to be bad. Kate suspected it would come to this- they would be done care about the physical aspects of them and start fucking with their minds instead. And yeah, Sawyer was tough, but everyone had a weak spot, and it seemed those people knew his.

"I'm gonna go take a shower, first." Sawyer said subduedly.

Kate nodded, giving his hand a squeeze and letting him go. On second thought, she padded quietly after him.

Sawyer flicked on the lights and started unbuttoning his sweat-drenched shirt, peeling it off gratefully. He turned around to close the door, but Kate was standing in the doorway, looking like an angel. "You gonna let me in?" She asked softly, leaning against the doorframe. Not waiting for an answer, she slipped under the arm that was holding the door and pushed it closed with her foot.

Laying her head softly on his chest, she sighed as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer so she could hear his heartbeat, thumping desolately against her ear.

"Sawyer," she said softly, "no matter what they said to you, I love you, ok?"

"I love you too, Katie," he said, voice raspy, "no matter what." Kate didn't notice as one of his tears fell onto her head. By god… the woman before him was carrying a baby, and he didn't know what was worse- the fact that it was his baby or _not. _It scared the hell out of him for a million different reasons. No kid should be brought into a world like this. Should he tell Kate, or let her find out for herself? Right now, it didn't matter.

Kate tilted her head back and kissed him softly, steering them towards the shower where the broke apart for a minute to hurriedly pull their constricting clothing off and turn the water on so that they could continue their soft, yet insistent frenzy of touching, like they were memorizing the other incase tomorrow never came.

They made love under the hot, sulfury spray, a sense of overwhelming desperation consuming them. The cold tiles provided sharp contrast to the hot water as Sawyer pressed Kate up into the shower wall, each of them holding on for dear life as a flurry of water and sensation rippled through them, like it was the last time they would every feel anything _good _again.


	11. XI

Chapter 11

AN: Holy. Fuck. The Lost writers pretty much just pwned every single fanfic writer ever. The premiere was amazing. Especially… Other village. Well, I am definitely going to try to incorporate some of the new stuff, mostly just the places. I can't really introduce new characters like Juliet… so they just won't exist. And yeah, even though Henry's real name is Ben, I'm going to keep using Henry.

Sorry it took me so long to dish this out. Hope you enjoy.

hobbits on the island: Hahaha I laughed so hard when I read your review! A Skaby sounds like... and STD or something. :D

Sawyer jerked awake as the warm body nestled beside him sprang out of bed and sprinted out of the room. "Kate!" he called groggily, getting up and trying to pull his pants on hurriedly.

Jack was already up, sipping some coffee and reading some dog-eared, yellow book. He looked up as Kate came rushing out of the bedroom, hand on her mouth, looking like she was going to be sick. "Kate," he said, getting up to go see what was the matter, but Sawyer sprinted out of the bedroom and cut him off on the way. Jack took a step back, suddenly realizing what this was about and how much he _didn't _want to be involved.

Kate was pregnant.

Currently she was throwing up the meager contents of her stomach, hit by early and severe morning sickness that would probably last a lot of her pregnancy.

Or maybe she had eaten something that upset her stomach, or she had some sort of stomach flu, Jack thought hopefully. But the horrible sinking feeling in his stomach told him otherwise.

Sawyer shoved past Jack, giving him a look that clearly said _stay the fuck out of this. _He turned the doorknob and shoved violently, but Kate had bolted the door and only the sounds of her dry, pitiful retching could be heard.

"Kate!" Sawyer yelled angrily, pounding on the door. "Are you ok? Lemme in, goddamnit!"

"Sawyer," Jack said gently. "It's ok. It was probably just something she ate."

Sawyer gave him a look so significant that Jack actually took a step back, realizing their mutual knowledge without saying a world.

"How did you find out?" Jack asked dully.

"They told me," Sawyer said haggardly. "Told me it might not be mine."

"_What?" _Jack said, dropping his hands to his sides. "If those fuckers even _touched _her-"

"Jack," Sawyer said listlessly, too drained to lie, "it might not be mine 'cause it might be _yours._"

Jack paused for a moment as he tried to absorb the very idea and failed. "I'm not the one who's been _sleeping _with her for the last week and a half," he snapped.

At any other time, Sawyer would have cracked some joke or made some remark about how he got there first, but he didn't. He just blinked once and said irritably, "It was _them _Jack. Some experiment o' theirs. One of them told me yesterday. They don't know who the father is yet," he finished quietly.

Jack closed his mouth, suddenly aware that it was hanging open limply.

"_Fuck." _It was all he could say.

"Yeah." Sawyer nodded. "Wait- you hear that?"

Jack paused to listen. Kate wasn't throwing up anymore, but she was wheezing like she couldn't get enough air and making little gasping sounds.

"Kate!" Sawyer boomed, swinging into action and pounding on the door, "open up!"

----------------

Kate retched piteously, her empty stomach providing nothing much for her body to expel. Taking a deep, shuddering breath, she finally succeeded in controlling her nausea. Sawyer's muffled shouts and pounding rang in her ears as tears sprang unbidden to her eyes. Padding shakily to the sink, she rinsed out her mouth and splashed water on her face to disguise the tears. _Oh God, _Kate repeated to herself, over and over again. Her predicament worsened tenfold in that moment, when she realized exactly what was wrong with her.

A baby.

Kate paused, waiting for some sweeping feeling of joy or motherly love to sweep through her at her self-admission.

It didn't.

Just cold, icy fear and a growing feeling of stifling panic... sucking the breath from her lungs and out of the room. Kate slid to the floor, shivering and sweating, looking desperately from side to side as the walls seemingly closed in on her. Sawyer's continued shouts of "_Kate! Are you ok!" and "Open the fucking door!" _seemed distant and unimportant. There was just the all-encompassing feeling of panic.

Somewhere, in the back of her mind, a little voice reminded her of something that Jack had told her when they first crashed... though it seemed to be such a long time ago...She took a deep, shaky breath, and started.

"_One." _

_Teresa falls up the stairs. Boone falls out of the sky._

_Two._

_Yeah, Shannon was a bitch. Did she deserve that bullet? Probably._

_Three._

_Ana Lucia hadn't meant to kill her. But comeuppance is fair play._

_Four._

_He hadn't planned on shooting Libby. But it was all Hurley's fault. He forgot the blankets._

_Five._

_One wretched new life, for all this death. _

The old, rusty doorknob lock broke and Sawyer and Jack broke in, bringing oxygen with them.Sawyer rushed over and scooped Kate up in his arms, cradling her as her shivering and sobs subsided. Jack came forward and knelt beside them, checking to make sure Kate hadn't done anything... stupid to herself.

"Kate," he said firmly, trying to get her attention. "You're having a panic attack. You just need to breath, ok?"

Kate's eyes flew around wildly, landing on Jack for only a moment as he spoke.

"Sawyer," Jack murmured quietly. "You should take her to the bedroom. Let her lie down. I'll see if I can find something for her to drink."

Sawyer nodded, eyes wide and frightened, and scooped Kate up and carried her to the bedroom princess style.

He pulled the thin sheet over her as she shivered, the cold burst of sweat having cooled her body down a little too much. Sawyer didn't say anything as she settled down and her whimpers died away; he just stroked her hair gently, lost in thought about just how unlucky they all were.

It wasn't something they would admit to themselves very often- just because the conclusion was so bleak. They were stuck here. Kate would have her baby here. They would probably take her or it, or both of them, away. Even if they did manage to escape, Kate would be stuck with a kid and would never know who was its father. And then they would live and die on this island, stuck in the same ridiculous love triangle fighting over one woman and her child. And god- even if they did get rescued, how was that looking for them? Kate was definitely going to jail. Sawyer probably was too- he was wanted in several states. And Sawyer hated to admit that he cared, but Jack would probably be alone, having to raise a child while they were in jail.

Really, the only conclusion was that they were better off passing around a rusty razor blade and just finishing it. But now they had something to live for, someone to fight for, and even though Kate had definitely not come to the same conclusion as Sawyer, he truly hoped she would.

"You wanna talk about this, Katie?" Sawyer asked softly as she settled down.

"No," was her very final sounding answer. "It's nothing. I just- I ate something bad. Your sloppy joes."

Sawyer grimaced at the mental image of regurgitated sloppy joes for a moment. "We both know that ain' true Freckles."

"Yeah?" she said challengingly, eyes blazing. "And how exactly do _you _know? Are you the one who's- who's-" she just couldn't bring herself to say it.

"No," he conceded, "but there's a good chance it's mine."

Just then Jack walked in with a mug of something hot. "I found some old tea bags," he said, setting the cup down on the night table. "They're probably ancient, but I don't think dried leaves go bad. Should help your stomach, anyways."

"You wanna give us a minute alone, Jack?" Kate snapped, feeling moody.

"No, actually," Jack said, giving Sawyer a significant look.

"Jack..." Sawyer sighed, ignoring Kate's protests, "have a seat."

----------------

The day outside the sterile white walls of Jack, Kate, and Sawyer's domestic hell-hole was stifling. It wasn't enough that the sun was beating down mercilessly, but the humidity that came with being on the coast was trapped underneath the forest canopy and superheated to an extremely uncomfortable temperature. Sayid and Jin traipsed through the jungle, neither of them complaining.

Jin's English had been improving steadily over the last few weeks. He had finally pushed his ire at Sun not telling him aside and allowed her to begin teaching him some English. If he was spoken to very slowly in simple terms he could understand, he could usually figure out what was being said and respond in the same manner. Of course, the first English words he learned here on the island were much different than the first words he would have learned back... on the rest of the world. 'Food' of course, was a big one, as was "Others', 'gun' and 'help'.

Sayid had approached him this morning and told Sun, who was with him, that he was going on a reconnaissance trip, and would he like to come along? Jin had been reluctant of course, as Sun was pregnant, but she assured him that they were just going to go and look around and not do anything dangerous.

---------------

_Earlier._

"I've had enough of your bullshit, Pickett," Henry said angrily. I want the suppressants injected today. Now!"

They were all seated around the table in Henry's home office, a rare occurrence. Alex looked around, feeling envious that only the highest-ranking members got to live in these nice houses. The rest were in tents on the beach, living like veritable animals. _When you turn eighteen, _Henry had always told her, _maybe you can live in one of the houses. _

Pickett and Henry were arguing heatedly over whether or not to proceed with the next stage of the pregnancy: to suppress Kate's memory and keep her sedated, as they had with Claire. But Alex was feeling increasingly uneasy about this.

"Fine," Henry snapped, "we'll put it to a vote," he said menacingly, looking at everyone with a 'you know what'll happen if you don't my way' stare. "All those in favour."

Alex raised her hand weakly, not stupid enough to incur Henry's wrath.

Suddenly, just to the left of Henry's shoulder, leaning on the filing cabinet was Shannon, not looking at Alex. She was holding a dark haired baby, her fingers pressed to her lips.

Alex clapped her hand to her mouth to keep from yelling.

"You alright, Alex?" Bea questioned, looking suspicious. Alex nodded quickly and coughed violently, pretending to have choked accidentally.

"It's settled then," Henry said, ignoring the outburst. "Alex, take someone and go get her."

----------------

Jack had never felt so awkward in his entire life.

It was like some horrible nightmare one would have in high school. Kate was sitting there, hands folded tightly in her lap and chewing her bottom lip red raw while Sawyer looked on with a sort of helpless sympathy.

And god- this wasn't even supposed to be his fucking problem. He hadn't done anything... or in this case, anyone. But still, Kate was pregnant and it might be his. _There's a better chance it's Sawyer's, _Jack reasoned to himself. But there was still that chance that it was his.

The thing he feared the most, however, was that Kate would give up.

She had run all her life, and now, in this virtual cage, there was nowhere else to go. It was truth time for all of them. Time to reflect, time to find themselves. It was not supposed to be time to play guinea pigs to bored, crazy scientists, goddammit.

Kate looked severely alarmed. "Sawyer..." Jack said quietly. "You'd better explain already."

"Yeah, you'd better," Kate said, her ghostly pallor so normal now that no one noticed it anymore. She looked anxiously from side to side, wondering what the hell was going on. Yeah, she knew she was... God, she couldn't even bring herself to say it. _Pregnant. Pregnant. Pregnant! _She tested out the word inside her head, not particularly enjoying the nauseous, sick feeling in sent jolting through the pit of her stomach. But something else was going on here. Jack and Sawyer were _getting along, _seemingly united in something. That was never a good sign.

"We uh- found out what Pinky an' the Brain was trying to do with us. Er, you and Doc Giggles."

Kate just gave him a look, and then turned to Jack, hoping for a better answer. He just shrugged and huffed, opening his mouth as if he was trying to choose the best words. "I guess the Others were kind of pissed of that they didn't get a hold of Claire's baby..." he said lamely, and then fell silent.

Kate felt the anger welling up in her, positive that they could feel in emanating from her as they cowered. "I'm tired of you two sneaking around behind my back. Tell me what's going on _now,"_ Kate said, shooting scalding glance at Jack and one to Sawyer that implied that he wasn't getting _any _ever again if he didn't tell her.

"Kate," Sawyer said, voice barely more than a whisper, "the baby... it might not be mine." He looked up and locked gazes with her; face grim and almost saddened... like he was, for the first time in his life, considering he wanted children.

He was no spring chicken anymore... at the not-so-tender age of thirty-seven, some clock in him was ticking... and stuck here, he thought about things he never would have thought of back home. Wishing he had settled down... wishing he had let go of his demons, wishing for a real life instead of the restless one he had once led... that life that had gotten him stuck here. He supposed they were _all _here because of that.

Kate didn't say a word. She sat down again, fearing her legs would collapse from beneath her.

"It could be Jack's," Sawyer pressed on, his usual talent for expelling mounds of bullshit in order to avoid a question suddenly evaporated. "Y'know, test tube baby or whatever."

Just then Alex burst through the bedroom door with a man holding a large rifle. "Kate," she beckoned, looking pained, "get up."

Kate didn't even resist. She didn't look to Jack or Sawyer for help, she didn't even give off her normal passive aggressive air. She just got up and took Alex by her hand, as if she had shut down and reverted to some sad child. Alex looked down, slightly alarmed, but satisfied that Kate wasn't going to try and beat her up or anything.

"I don't think there's any need for the gun. You can go," she said to the man, trying to sound authoritative. He scowled, but left.

"Alex," Sawyer said, truly believing she was on their side. "What are they going to do to Kate?"

Alex looked severely pained. "Look, if I don't deliver her, they'll kill me, I'm sure of it," she whispered. "But I'm going to try and get you guys out of here, I promise. Some things are worse than being dead."

"Why are you whisp-" Jack said, before he was cut off with an audible, angry sounding "Shut up!" from Alex.

"The cameras," she whispered. "They're old. They can't hear us if we whisper."

Jack turned his head only to be hissed at by Alex. "Don't look! We have to go now, and you probably won't see each other for a while."

Sawyer stood up, suddenly very unwilling for this to happen.

"Sawyer," Kate said, "It's ok." She was still holding onto Alex's hand, feeling overwhelmingly trusting of this girl for no apparent reason.

"Ka-" Sawyer said, stopping mid word as Alex whisked her away.

Sawyer followed, trying to follow them out, but the armed man was waiting at the door to shove him back in. He stumbled backwards and tripped over his own feet, falling ass first onto the cold concrete floor. Not bothering to get back up, Sawyer lay there and sobbed like he hadn't in years.

----------------

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	12. XII

Chapter 12

Thank you all so much for your kind reviews! I absolutely love reading them and I love writing this, so I'm grateful you're wasting your time reading this. Anyways, on with the show.

Just wanted to let you know, in case you're getting antsy, everyone is going to be flying the coup next chapter. i.e. escapage!

I can't promise they'll be all in one piece, though.

Anybody see the extremely hot looking preview for next week? Skate: 28374928374239, Jate: 0. Intense. Especially the end of the preview.

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Sayid and Jin's trek through the jungle had been rather successful. Not only had they located what seemed to large, central point of the Others' dominion, but they had glimpsed Kate a few times as well. It had been Jin who saw her first, squinting into the dim morning as the sun rose. He had pointed out a thin, defeated looking brunette being escorted to and from places by armed men and a shorter dark haired girl whom Sayid immediately identified as Alex.

So far, they hadn't run into any trouble. It seemed as if the Others thought that the group of castaways would heed the warning brought by Hurley, and didn't seem terribly concerned with guarding the perimeter. Alex also sometimes walked around on her own after dark, Sayid had noted, and therein lay their chance of getting her and speaking to her again.

Jin shifted in uncomfortably. They had been sitting high up in the trees, the natural foliage perfect for disguising their location. At night, when all was calm, they would climb down and retreat to the little cave they had found and light a fire. Sayid could tell Jin was getting impatient and wanted to go back to see Sun, not wanting to spend much time away from her in her delicate state.

It was a particularly ideal for Alex to go wandering by herself. It was a new moon tonight, so there was no natural lighting at all, save for the stars. Sayid, however, could see quite well as he had been sitting in the dark for some time, giving his pupils time to dilate and see extraordinarily well for the poor conditions. His ears were also finely tuned, filtering the ordinary sounds of the night- the rustling of the trees, the noises of animals and the far off sound of the rolling ocean waves- from the sounds that were man made.

"There," Jin whispered sharply, pointing at a dark figure who was quickly scurrying across their line of sight.

Sayid leaned forwards and squinted, trying to confirm his suspicions. "Yes, that's her. Let's go."

They quickly climbed down and crept through the night, intent on catching Alex again.

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"What's your name?"

Kate snapped back to, looking for the source of the voice that had brought her back to reality. Wait… had she been just daydreaming, or had she been sleeping? It didn't seem to matter… everything was fuzzy, but in a warm, safe kind of way.

The woman speaking was seated to her left in a big, comfy leather chair, wearing an expression similar to Kate's; the vacant look of someone injected full of enough sedatives to kill a horse.

Kate let her head droop to the side facing the woman. She was pretty, blonde, and wrapped up in a fuzzy looking wool blanket just like Kate's. "I'm Kate," she said, slurring somewhat. "Do I know you?"

The woman shrugged, as if she wasn't sure how to answer. "I'm having a baby, you know," she said, smiling a wide, dopey kind of smile.

Kate looked down at her stomach, as if this reminded her of something. "I think I am too," she said, absently rubbing her still flat tummy.

"Oh," the blonde woman said, sounding slightly disinteresting. "Do you want it to be a boy, or a girl?"

Kate shrugged, having not considered this at all. "I don't care. I don't really want it anyways. I wasn't supposed to be having it."

The blonde woman looked at her with a confused, though somewhat sympathetic look. They didn't speak for a moment, until the other woman opened her mouth, as if she were trying to recall the words she was going to use. "My name is-"

"And how are my favorite ladies today?" A male voice called out, followed by Henry sweeping into the room carrying a tray with two sandwiches, two glasses of milk and a vase with a rather dilapidated looking carnation.

Kate peered at the man, getting the feeling she knew him from somewhere, but simply couldn't place. Henry seemed to notice her look. "It's Ben, Kate. You must be a little groggy from your nap."

She nodded slowly, accepting his explanation simply because she didn't have one of her own.

"I made you grilled cheese, Kate. I know it's your favourite." Henry said, putting the tray down beside her. She looked up at him in amazed, adoring wonder, the way a child would look at someone they admired.

Ben smiled back, quite pleased with results of the injections.

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"Goddamnit, Sawyer, you have to eat _something_," Jack said exasperatedly, trying to shove a plate of food towards Sawyer for the umpteenth time that day. Kate had been taken barely two days ago and Sawyer hadn't done anything since. _Anything. _He'd been sitting on the couch, staring at the white, sterile looking wall, getting up only to slink to the washroom to relieve himself. He hadn't eaten, showered, or slept, as far as Jack could see.

Sawyer gave him a stony look and resumed staring at the wall.

Jack let out a long breath and decided on a gentler approach. They had, after all, suffered another upheaval. "Look, you aren't going to be any help to Kate if you just sit there and waste away. We have an opportunity to bide our time and save our strength here."

"Jack," Sawyer said, looking like he was about to say something important.

"Yeah?"

"Fuck off."

"Fine," Jack snapped, feeling his charitable mood slip away. He threw the plate of food haphazardly on the coffee table and stalked away. He was so tired of the push and pull… the constant switching of roles. Jack and Kate fell apart, Sawyer kept them together. Sawyer and Kate fell apart… Jack kept them together. And that seemed to be what was happening the majority of the time.

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"Hey Kate?" Sarah asked, looking around their shared room with mild interest. "Our babies are going to grow up together!"

Kate smiled a wide, dopey smile. She had met this woman barely a day ago- but she didn't care. It seemed they had known each other all their lives. After lunch, Ben had taken them to the nursery, which had two beds and two cribs and lots of books and toys. Both women had been delighted. "If you have a boy, and I have a girl, they might even get married!"

Sarah giggled, but then frowned. "Why do you get to have a girl?"

Kate shrugged. "I've always wanted one."

"So have I," Sarah said petulantly. "How about we both have a girl?"

"Fine," Kate scowled, as if she wasn't completely happy with the proposition.

The door swung open and Ben came in, a tray with two bottles of medicine and needles in hand.

"Ben, not again!" Sarah whined.

"You don't want the baby to get sick, do you Sarah?" Ben asked sternly, drawing the liquid out of one of the bottles. "Kate doesn't mind, see?" Ben said, slipping the needle into Kate's arm. Kate bit her lip but said nothing.

"Fine," Sarah said, rolling up her sleeve. "I can be brave like Kate too."

"Atta girl," Ben said, smiling, and gave her the needle. "Time for your check up, Sarah. Come with me, please."

Sarah got up and let Ben heard her out of the room. As soon as they were gone, Kate sunk back into her chair, suddenly feeling very unsettled. Needles had never upset her that much, had they?

Suddenly, broken, distorted images flooded her brain-

_She was screaming like she'd never screamed in her life- and she wasn't sure why. Maybe she'd finally realized just how royally fucked she was. Or maybe it was those maternal instincts kicking in, because she knew they were going to hurt the baby. **Her **baby. If it wasn't motherly love, it was at least a fierce sense of possession. _

_Her wrists and ankles and middle was bound to the table with thick leather while faces floated above her, wearing masks and holding needles and knives. Perhaps they were low on sedatives- not that that had seemed to be the case for the last few weeks. Maybe it was just the sadistic pleasure of watching a woman scream bloody murder because she couldn't protect her child. And what was she screaming, anyways? It was Sawyer, Sawyer, Sawyer and even a desperate Jack every now and then until her vocal cords were damaged beyond repair and she was hysterical and crying until she was breathless._

And then as quickly as the images had come, they spirited away, leaving a very sane, conscious and undrugged Kate crying and shivering in her chair. She looked around desperately, wondering where the hell she was and what the _fuck _was going on. More importantly, where was Sawyer? Jack?

Thoughts floated hazily through her head. They had drugged her, and she was pretty sure Henry- Ben- whoever, had just drugged her again. But why wasn't it working? Maybe it was some window, wherein the last batch of drugs wore off before the new ones kicked in. It seemed to be the only possible explanation. But where would that leave her? Stuck in a room... with some blond woman, named Sarah. Had she been on the plane? Kate didn't recall.

Suddenly, she couldn't remember what she had just been thinking about for the life of her. She gulped, knowing the drugs were kicking in again. _No, no, no no no! _She though desperately as her memories slipped away again like dry sand through limp fingers. She gulped. _Sawyer, think of Sawyer. You love Sawyer. Sawyer Sawyer... _

_Who?_

And then it was all gone again.

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"Hel- oomph!" Alex felt the breath fly out of her lungs as someone knocked her legs out from beneath her. Blind panic enveloped her for an instant, but annoyed realization came to her as soon as she made out the figure standing above her. "Sayid!" she hissed, getting up and brushing herself off, "you don't have to kidnap me if you want to talk to me!"

"I'm sorry," he said, almost smiling. "Next time I will just come to your camp and _ask politely _if you're around." He extended a hand, which Alex took, and pulled her up off of the ground. "We need to know where your loyalties stand," he said, getting right down to business.

Alex looked taken aback by the abrupt question. It wasn't as if she hadn't thought about it, but she still hadn't come to a decision. She crossed her arms and shifted her weight, looking antsy.

"Well?" Sayid asked, his tone indicating that he was in no mood for nonsense. After another moment's silence, he started again. "Alex, you need to-"

"Fine!" She snapped. "Yes, ok, I'm with you!" She was obviously nervous and riled. "I just don't want anyone to get hurt."

Sayid looked at her sadly. "We'll do our best, I promise."

"I want come back with you guys," she said, suddenly feeling very small. Tears came to her eyes. All her life she'd been so grown up, and she just didn't want to be anymore.

"You know that's not possible right now," Sayid said gently. "It would put many lives at risk if you disappeared. But the time will come, I promise."

"What do you want then?" she asked, voice quavering.

"Just some information. Where are our people being held?"

"In- in the medical station," Alex sniffed, trying to keep her crying under controlled. "God, if they ever found out that I told you…"

"I promise that we won't do anything until we make sure that you and your mother are safe with us, alright?"

Alex nodded, wiping her eyes and taking a deep breath. She looked around, as if you make sure no one was watching and then threw herself forward and enveloped Sayid in a huge bear hug. Sayid's eyes widened, but he couldn't help but wrap his arms around her. Jin couldn't help but smile. This was the sort of thing that crossed all language barriers.

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Nothing had changed in the flat from hell. Jack was still pacing restlessly and Sawyer, who was practically catatonic, was still sitting on the couch staring listlessly on the wall.

It wasn't until many hours later that the door swung open.

"Henry," Jack spat, "what have you done with her?"

Sawyer pushed himself farther back into the couch, knowing that if he moved a muscle it would be to break that bastard's neck.

"You can call me Ben, Jack. That's my real name."

"I don't care, what your real name is, _Henry,_ I want to know where Kate is!"

"Kate is fine," Ben said, waving a hand dismissively. "And it's your lucky day. We're letting you go."

"What?" Jack asked, hardly daring to believe his ears.

"I'll have someone escort you two off our premises. There is one catch, Jack,"

"What?" he said icily.

"You are never to set foot here again. If any of your people ever set foot here again, you will regret it."

"What, did you think we were going to come back and visit?"

"Jack, I'm serious," Ben warned. "We will kill her if you ever come here again."

Jack blanched. "I though you said you were going to let us go."

"I'm letting you two go. Not her. Not until she has the baby, anyways. We don't care about her. We just care about getting your child, Jack, because you're _special. _And not special like your mommy always said you were," Henry said smiling a little, thoroughly enjoying the reaction he was getting. "Oh, and Jack," he said, wanting to add just one more thing, "it _is _your child."

Sawyer stood up abruptly.

"How can you know that?" Jack snapped, "she's barely a month along-"

"We have our ways. Now get ready to leave, someone will be along to escort you out in a moment. James, what are you doing?"

Sawyer was rummaging through the kitchen, pulling cans and boxes off shelves and things out of drawers. "I'm stockin' up for the walk back. You got a problem with that, Darth?"

"Be my guest," Henry said. "I'll put it on your tab."

"Jack," Sawyer said suddenly, "stand in front of the door, and don't let him through."

"What?" Jack and Ben asked at the same time, confusion in Jack's voice and slight panic in Ben's.

Sawyer turned around, menacingly holding a large kitchen knife.

"James, I think you need to put that down," Henry said, trying to back away, but Jack had stepped in his way.

"No, I don' think I do," he said, taking slow, deliberate steps forward. He knew that he had all the right reasons to kill this man.

"You don't want me to kill her, do you?" Ben said, starting to panic.

"You can't kill her if he kills you first," Jack said, suddenly realizing what Sawyer had in mind. The strange thing was that he had absolutely no objection. Even after all those years of being a doctor and 'do no harm' and all that, he didn't think he'd mind if Sawyer stuck that knife though Ben's gut. Had they really all come to this? Become this?

"Where's his heart, Jack?"

"Here," Jack said, indicating the location on his own chest. Sawyer wasn't going to make the mistake he made with the martial again. "Make sure you slide the knife in so that it's parallel to his ribs. That way it'll slip through his ribs," he said with cold, medical precision.

Sawyer lunged forward and drove the knife through Ben's chest without a second thought.

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Dundundun. Just a heads up, all of the Losties are getting out of Other-hell next chapter. I don't anticipate that this story will be more than twenty chapters long, but I do have a sequel in mind:D


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